hostage || l.t ✔️

thirty three

William Hayes
Ally and I haven't been going to school for a while , and she's been sleeping around to keep her mind occupied, and I told her she was strange for wanting to do that. However she copes with London isn't my choice.

I've been coping...as well as I can. It's very hard to have my girlfriend with me one night, and then not the next. I miss her so much, everyone's been a asking me a lot about her. I didn't help plan her funeral because I refuse to believe she's dead.

Everyone came, the whole school put on a show as well. They had a whole school assembly to honour her and they wanted Ally and I to say something but ai refused so they just got teachers to do it.

It was hard, some people were crying. It's not she's their girlfriend. I was honestly to numb to cry. I had been so sad over her. I just wanna know where she is, or if she's actually dead.

I miss her like that as well.

I know she wasn't a very big fan of anything sexual, and I ever really did anything to her expect for have sex with her. She's gotten on her knees for me a few times but I'm just to scared to do it back to her because I didn't want to hurt her.

I told Ally about it and she set me up with a girl called Matilda. We were going out on a "date" as they call it but they both know about London and my situation with her. I don't know how this will go but I'm trying my hardest.

It was Friday, and I was picking her up from her house and taking her out. I was nervous. She comes out of her front door with a skirt on and tucked into it was her shirt, her hair was straight and flowy and she was pretty.

Nothing would ever compare to London though.

"Hey," she smiles, heavily smelling like perfume. I breathe out slowly and smile.

"Hey," I breathe as she gets in and closes the door.

"How are you?"

"To be honest...I'm nervous," I admit and she nods.

"I understand," she said. I just sigh and start my car up, driving to the restaurant in silence. We didn't have anything to say yet, she knew about London so she was giving me space which I appreciate.

When we got there, she wanted to hold my hand but I couldn't, I felt like I would be cheating on London if I were to hold her hand. We walked in and got seated at the front near the window. "Thank you for going here with me," she says softly.

"Yeah," I shrug. I silently sigh.

I miss London so much.

"So...now that's Londons gone I guess you can get back into the dating world,"

I cock my head back. "She's not gone," I scold, shaking my head.

"I'm pretty sure she's gone, Will, and I know it's hard to—"

"She's not dead, okay? She's just...not here, I'm going to find her," I shake my head. She sighs and shrugs back, clearly unsure if she believes it. "I can't explain it but it's a feeling,"

"You guys were voted couple of the year," she says and I look down and smile.

"I know..but she didn't want to be popular,"

"She the talk of school," she said.

"I know," I nod. "I don't really like it,"

"Why?" she asks.

"Because. She's my girlfriend and I'm protective of her," I shrug.

"What do you think happened to her then?" she says and I sigh through my nose.

"I think—"

"Hey guys, what am I get started for you?" a male waiter comes up to us, and I stop.

"Water for me please," she smiles.

"Yeah, water for me too please," I ask too. He nods and walks away.

"You were saying?" she says.

"Well...I was at the bar with her and she went to get a drink and I never saw her after that," I start. "I think something had, had happened to her, but I don't know what,"

"Do you think she went home with the guy she was talking up?"

I furrow my brows. "Wait ehat?" I ask.

"Ally told me, she was chatting up a guy at the bar, before Ally went home with someone else,"

I blink at her. "She..was talking a guy up?" I say in shock. Tilda just shrugs.

"I was only told this," she shrugs. "But no one ever saw her after that,"

"You're saying she was...murdered?"

"Maybe.."

I instantly think of the worse, and how she could've been killed, assaulted or anything else. "This is just what I heard Will..for all we know she could be fine,"

"Yeah but I know her, if she was safe, she'd tell us, or find a way to let us know," I say.

"Maybe she's...with someone?"

"Like who?"

"I don't know Will," she shrugs and I was surprised she wanted to actually talk about this to be honest.

"You acts want to talk about this?"

"It's how you cope, and I know you're still in love with her and I find this hopeless but I've been jealous of London for as long as I can remember," she says, swallowing before adding more. "I've had a crush on you for ages,"

"Really?" I was actually shocked. I always used to think London was too pretty for me and depending who you ask, they'll agree, but I didn't know she ever liked me.

"Yeah. And, I thought things would be different now Londons gone but nothing has changed much,"

"Here are your waters," he comes back and places them down. "Are we ready to order?"

"Pasta for me please," she says. "Whatever's cheapest," she shrugs and he bids, writing it down.

"Um..I'll get the..the chips, please," I said and he nods. "Smallest size you've got because I'm not very hungry thanks,"

"Of course, shouldn't be to long guys," he smiled and walked away again.

"I don't want to talk about this anymore," I shook my head. I love London but Tilda doesn't deserve to hear my feelings for her, especially when she has a crush on me still.

"You're a good guy Will," she smiles and I smiled back. "I wish you thought the same,"

I smile softly at her again. "Thank you, Tilda, I appreciate it,"

She smiled and traced my hand, tracing the one vein sticking out.

//
i imagine will as a blonde version of younger brad pitt, like the one in friends🫶