Hilarious Texts And Tales Of The Clone Wars

Turkey Day

*This takes place before or after the trip*

Ahsoka: Happy Thanksgiving Everyone!

Anakin: wait Thanksgiving is today?

Obi Wan: you didn't know that? Why did you think I was drinking my turkey flavored tea?

Jesse: yuck.

Anakin: I didn't notice. Anyways, I Gtg.

Ahsoka: where are you going?

Anakin: a family deal.

Obi Wan: but you don't have any family left.

Fives: yeah, didn't jawas kill them or something?

Rex: seriously

Echo: uh, pretty sure they were tusken raiders.

Ahsoka: yeah, I've heard all those creepy horror stories about them

Jesse: once I heard this story where they vandalized this person's coffin with smiley faces.

Fives: how is that creepy?

Hardcase: uh, because then everyone thought the dead person was possessed and that they came alive at night.

Rex: please I've heard way creepier stories than that.

Tup: okay! No more guys! you'll give me nightmares about these creepy dudes!

Anakin: oh, don't worry, I killed them all. And not just the-

Obi Wan: yeah, we know Anakin. Not just the men, but the women, and the children too

Ahsoka: I killed them! I killed them all! Anakin rehearses this for us all of the time. 😒😒😒

Obi wan: we've pretty much memorized it.

Rex: o-k

Anakin: anyways I'm actually going to this dinner thing with Padme.

Ahsoka: I knew you were dating her!

Anakin: dating? No....

Obi Wan: right, your married.

Anakin: yeah

Fives:

Jesse:

Echo:

Tup:

Hardcase:

Rex:

Ahsoka:

Obi Wan: ????

Anakin: I mean.... Uh.... Were practically married...as in were super good friends! Ha...ha...ha... Its not like I secretly married her or anything....

Ahsoka: okay Anakin we all totally believe that.

Anakin: phew!

Rex: pretty sure she was just being sarcastic.

Ahsoka: yeah, I was

Anakin: well anyways I'm leaving now! Bye! 👋 👋

Obi Wan: were not done yet Anakin. We want to know what the tea is with you and Padme.

Fives: yeah!

Jesse: I bet he got married to her

Tup: yeah, I bet they go on dates all the time

Ahsoka: I bet they even text each other with hear emojis. 💖💕💖

Rex: 💖💕💖.

Fives: ohohoh...

Rex: I was just giving a demonstration.

Echo: I bet they get each other flowers all the time too.

Hardcase: I bet they'll have twin kids one day.

Obi Wan: why do you think that?

Hardcase: idk

Ahsoka: why are we sitting here talking about what Anakin and Padme probably do together? Its Thanksgiving for goodness sake

Fives: don't you mean turkey day?

Ahsoka: ???

Rex: he calls it turkey day.

Echo: yeah, idk why.

Hardcase: wait I though it was chicken day?!?!

Obi wan: ???

Jesse: long story short once Rex got a chicken for Thanksgiving dinner and ever since then Hardcase has called it turkey day.

Ahsoka: oh, okay?

Satine has added herself to this chat

Satine: hey, guys! I'm throwing a thanksgiving party. Does anyone want to come?

Obi Wan: is there tea?

Satine: uh, yeah! A whole fountain of it!

Obi Wan: 💖 ☕💖

Ahsoka: lol

Satine: no, I'm being serious. I have a whole fountain of tea.

Rex: why?

Satine: uh...none of your business! Now does anyone else want to come?

Ahsoka: sure. No way do I want to attend the Boring Jedi order dinner. Mace windu gives this hour long speech about how we should all be thankful, and then master Yoda always seems to find a way to sneak the turkey all to himself while Mace Windu goes on and on.

Obi Wan: oh, yeah. Didn't be hide it on that bantha head once?

Ahsoka: yeah!

Rex: okay... Another thing I've learned not to question. I'll go to the party too.

Fives: you know I go wherever Rexsoka goes...

Ahsoka: stoppp you sound like a stalker.

Rex: technically he is.

Echo: yep. I'll go to.

Tup: same.

Jesse: and me! Wherever there is a feast I'm in!

Hardcase: me too! Can't wait to dig into that chicken!

Satine: you mean turkey?

Hardcase: iTs ChIcKeN dAy

Satine: ok...I'm not even going to question What that means. See you guys soon!

*everyone together*

'Happy Turkey Day!'