Hilarious Texts And Tales Of The Clone Wars

Porg Hunting

Anakin: Are we ready my men?

Rex: umm....

Fives: I got the bait.

Jesse: Marshmallows. No, Hardcase, don't eat them!!!

Dogma: This is just a disaster waiting to happen

Cody: Agreed

Obi Wan: I agree. The only reason I'm coming along is because Anakin promised me three tons of tea

Anakin: -shrugs- I can't go porg hunting by myself

Rex: Do you really have enough money for three tons of tea?

Anakin: Na, I stole it from Count Dooku. I also stole his stash of ice cream bars. Best crime of my life (so far) 😏😏😏

Cody: Oh god what have I sighed up for

Fives: Something exciting!

Obi Wan: I swear Anakin's going to kill a room full of kids one day...

Rex: Where did you even come up with the idea of porg hunting at, General Skywalker

Anakin: Well, I was having this dream, and there was this flying piece of bacon...

Dogma: ...wut

Jesse: I so wish that was real

Fives: It is. Just get some bacon, tie it to a string, then put it around your fan and turn it on

Jesse: Genious!

Cody: -gives them a weird look-

Obi Wan: And this dream?

Anakin: And then I woke up, because this porg flew right into my window, and I was like bam, porg hunting!

Rex: Do you even know where porgs live?

Anakin: I didn't, so I went and asked Padme. She gave me this map after she gave me this really deep sigh

Obi Wan: I sighed too when you texted me about this crazy idea

Anakin: So are we ready?

Jesse: Yeah. But what about Tup, Kix, and Echo?

Dogma: Tup was too soft. He doesn't have the heart to kill an innocent porg

Anakin: They're not so innocent, believe me. One ate all of my chinese noodles before I could stop it

Fives: Ah, Hardcase did that to my pizza once. And Echo just sighed and kept reading his Thrawn book so I took it that he didn't want to come

Rex: As for Kix...he has too much sense to go porg hunting

Cody: Then how did me and you get dragged into doing this?

Rex: ....our generals

Anakin: Let's go everyone! To the van!

And so they go to the van, going throughout the galaxy to go porg hunting

Fives: Are we ther yet?

Jesse: Or is this another stop?

Dogma: Because really do we need another dozen donuts?

Hardcase: Yessssss

Anakin: We're finally here! You may exit the van

Obi Wan: Uh, park the car first Anakin.

Anakin: Okie dookie. Everyone got their weapons?