Where Your Loyalties Lie - {Severus Snape x Reader}

-45-

We had very pleasant tea moment in the kitchen. Got to know Remus's bride and best man. They are really nice people. Tonks and I have lot of common. She's so fun and a warm person. It appears we did go Hogwarts together, but for some reason I can't remember her. Even she is a fellow Hufflepuff. Perhaps it's mostly because she's three years younger than me, or that I had my own issues to deal with back then. Sirius is quite a flirt, but not in a creepy way. Even he likes to joke around, he never crosses the line where I would feel uncomfortable. While we all are sitting around the table, we keep talking and laughing, genuinely having fun. This is nice. It came to my knowledge that Sirius is actually Harry Potter's godfather. They also told me how Remus and Sirius were really close friends with Harry's parents way back. What a small world we are living in.

It's getting late. Remus and I go upstairs and he shows me the guest bedroom I'll be spending the next two nights in. "Here we are." he opens the door and walks in, putting my luggage to the side. "Oh, this is really cute in here!" I look around while holding Sniffy in my arms. It's really cozy and simple room that has a bed with nightstand right next to it. A wardrobe and two chairs near the window, tiny table between them. The niffler jumps down and starts to look around. "Glad you like it. Feel free to ask if you need anything. We wish you to be comfortable." he smiles softly. "Thank you, Remus. You and Tonks are too kind." I smile back at him. "Why of course, (Y/N). You're practically like sister to me." he chuckles. That warms my heart. "I feel the same about you too." I admit. "Brother - I mean. Not a sister... That would be odd, now wouldn't it?" I quickly add with a laugh. Remus shook his head while smiling, thinking how silly I am.

After that, a small moment of silence lands onto the room. It makes me feel like there is something on Remus's mind, but he's unsure if he should say it out loud or not. Sniffy climbs to the bed and starts to make himself a home. "So, big day tomorrow, huh? You must be excited." I break the silence. There is a fade smile on his face now:"Yes. I suppose it is.". Huh? I watch as Remus walks up to one of the chairs near by the window and sits down, having his head down. He looks so pensive. With that, I take couple of steps towards the door and gently close it:"What's wrong?". For a moment he's silent. Like he's having this inner battle. Finally, he looks up to me:"(Y/N), I have a confession to make.". Crossing my arms over my chest with half judgemental look:"If it's a love confession, I will beat you up with my bare hands.".

That makes a small chuckle come out of him:"No. Nothing like that, don't you worry. I just... Need to get something off the chest". "What is it?" I ask, ready to hear him out. He takes a deep breath before speaking:"I wanna start with the fact that I love Tonks. She's the most precious thing that has ever happened to me, and I'll do anything for her.". I give a slight nod. I know he loves her with all his heart. I have seen the way he looks and interacts with her. There is no doubt in that. Remus continues:"She's perfect. Too perfect, actually.". Tilting my head a bit onto the side:"What you mean?". "I mean, look at me. I'm too old for her. I got no money to provide all the nice things for her in this world, no matter how much I wished to." he explains.

I just stare at him, heart sinking a bit. He looks down to his palms, slowly touching his fingers:"She deserves someone young and whole.". Hearing all this breaks my heart. How can someone as wonderful as him think like that? It's weird he is having these kinds of thoughts right now. After all, they have been together few years now. You would think they have had this conversation before he even decided to propose to her. "Did something happen between you two that makes you... Feel this way?" I ask cautiously. Remus pauses and looks at me again. "She's with a child." he reveals. My eyes widens and jaw drops a bit. "Before you jump in any conclusion; Yes. I am the father. Wanted to clear that out." he quickly adds. I walk beside him with huge smile on my face:"That's wonderful, Remus! I'm so happy for you two!". "Is it now?" he asks faintly. Frowning at the lack of eagerness:"What you mean? Yes! It is.".

Remus puts his head down, covers his face with one hand and sighs. I kneel down right in front of him, worried look on my face:"Remus..?". Trying to understand what's going on my friend's mind right now. Remus removes the hand away from his face, revealing there are some tears in his eyes:"How can I forgive myself for passing my condition to an innocent child?". Condition? Slowly realizing he means the werewolf part of him. Oh... That must be something he has always feared. Before I can say anything, he continues:"Two weeks ago - when she told me she's pregnant, I was shocked. Happy, but shocked. At the same time I tried to hide this... Guilt I'm feeling, and try to pretend everything's fine. But she knows me, and she... She must sense that I'm not fully on board with this.". My eyes shifts between his, face with full of compassion.

Then I finally speak up:"Remus, that woman loves you for you. Believe me, she has thought what's to come from the first day she started dating you. She knows the risks. She knows what's to come. She knows you. She knows your heart.". Remus looks surprised. Maybe part of him thought I would start yelling at him and tell him to just 'man up'. Since he's not talking, I continue:"And if you are worried what this child is going to go thru because of other people can be stupid enough to judge them for who they are... They have you as their father. Any child would be lucky to have you as their parent, Remus. Your parents maybe couldn't handle you being a werewolf as well as they should have, but... You can.".

Tears starts to come down his cheeks:"(Y/N)...". Even my own eyes starts to water up, but I try my best to keep the tears down and offer a gentle smile:"This world is already crazy and scary place, and there is not much we can do about it. But that's the thing... We get to choose who we'll spend that time with in this world of madness.". Enough said, Remus grabs me and pulls me into a hug while sitting on the chair while I'm on my knees between his legs. The hug that says:'Thank you for accepting me as I am'. Speaking out loud like this must've been a lot from him. We stay like that for a small moment before breaking the touch. He wipes off the tears and sniffles a bit:"You Hufflepuffs always find the right words.". His comment makes me chuckle:"Yeah. Guess we do.". That's when we share a smile.

It seems he feels a lot better now and more confident about becoming a parent. Remus sighs and gets up:"Well, I better get going. Get some sleep. After all, the big day is tomorrow.". I get up from the floor and follow him to the door:"Promise me you will talk to her of your fears as well.". He turns to me with soft smile:"I will. Thank you, (Y/N). You truly are a wonderful friend.". With that, we said our good nights and Remus left the room. I then go sit on edge of the bed and Sniffy comes beside me, so I start to pet him. Our little conversation left me feel a little bit... Pensive? All of this got me thinking how we all treat people in this world. Whenever it's about what kind of blood is running thru our veins. What House we all have been sorted in.

Reflecting the way I have always felt about Slytherins. How resentful and up tight I have been towards them all of my life. First people coming to my mind are my parents and Malfoy's family. The way they all have taunted me in their own way. Even the truth is, there are good people that are Slytherins. People who care and are kind despite the House they got sorted in when we were just kids. I start thinking about my aunt-Ruby and how kind she is. She has never shown any sings of disrespect or any trades she's a bad person. And most of all... I think about Severus. Just thinking about him makes me smile, even I try not to. How far we have come compared where we started... Even his face shows sourness most of the time, he is still a good person. A good man. Sometimes I do feel like he is scared to show the softer side of him to others. Even to me.