DECEMBER 2019
Awsten feels like shit the next day.
His throat aches, and it definitely feels like karma.
It makes everyone on the bus wary of him for most of the day, since he is guaranteed to be in a bad mood.
He fucks up during soundcheck, more times than he can count, and he can't seem to keep his focus for more than a couple of seconds at a time.
Meanwhile, Elle goes to the studio again. Her voice feels a little better than it did yesterday, which she hopes will mean that whatever she records will come out pretty decent today.
"Lets go for one more," she decides, once it reaches mid-afternoon. "I wanna do needy."
Zakk agrees easily, and they spend some time revamping the instrumental, until Elle is much happier with it.
As she pulls the sleeves of her sweater over her hands, Elle is now regretting not wearing one of Awsten's hoodies, yet again.
Their conversation from last night still feels very much unfinished, but she knows she wouldn't have gotten out everything she needed to say last night, even if she tried.
Once she steps inside the booth, she realises that deciding to work on this song, one of her most vulnerable to date, may not have been her wisest idea, on a day like today.
Elle barely makes it through the first verse, before she's starting to feel the lyrics burning into her chest.
But, she uses it to her advantage, though, and it turns out so much better than she'd even originally thought it would.
Elle takes another long walk home once they're done, allowing herself to think whilst out in the fresh, December air.
This kind of situation feels all too familiar, which means Elle is finding it hard to keep herself in check.
Arguing and lying is what she's used to in a relationship, and it feels far too normal for her that things to go unresolved.
Deep down, she doesn't want this to go unresolved. She knows that it has to be fixed, and that Awsten wants to fix it, too; but her old habits are leaving her blind to that right now.
She's tried to ignore what's been going on for most of her day, but as the evening creeps in, it's beginning to hit her a little harder.
When she gets home, she checks her laptop for the file that Zakk had sent her, and without much thought, she sends the song to Awsten.
He hasn't heard needy before, and it's been rewritten a few times since Elle first began writing it; she hopes that if he listens to the lyrics, it might be a little easier for them to talk things out at some point tonight.
In all honesty, though, Awsten is a little pissed off, too. He wanted Elle to stay on the phone, so they could actually talk, and fix things so that they can get back to normal.
To him, it feels like she gave up far too quickly, and he's desperately hoping that doesn't mean she wants to give up on him just as easily.
When Awsten's phone buzzes with a text from her, he automatically opens it as quickly as he can, before realising he really doesn't have the time to get into a conversation right now, since he's just minutes away from going on stage.
He notices that it's just a Dropbox file, of a song she's clearly finished today, and he feels a little bad that he doesn't have the time to listen to it right now.
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BLOOM • awsten knight
फैनफिक्शन[COMPLETE] Awsten Knight is in the aftermath of his break up, preparing for almost a full year of touring. He's going through his days mindlessly, awaiting the next sugar spike that will spark the start of this seemingly never ending cycle. His nex...
