Lost but found

Chapter ninteen

Novas POV

I sat on the sofa I had Amelia in my lap she would probably be falling asleep so I'd don't mind. She won't sleep unless I'm holding her. I just laid her having me while the torment started. " okay this is her first dance class" and Peter started the video. I hated seeing old videos because I could see where the bruises were. I just hoped no one else could. I was actually good I was only 4 in this but I was doing well. The next clip was me and Peter stood a few years later in ballet clothes and I could see my bruise on myself arms but the quality's shit so you can't really tell. I was smiling wide at the camera while Peter and I danced around. I smiled I looked happy there I always was at ballet. And then you could see me turning and we'll I had done 10 at once in my point shoes and even I was impressed with myself " you're so good novs" Lizzie said and I smiled " yeh watching this makes me miss it all" and she frowned " you don't dance anymore" and I shook my head " no I do a occasional class but no not serious anymore. I had to stop with sports" and she asked " why?" And before I could even think I answered " it was expensive and well my broken leg wasn't helpful" and then I went wide eyed and looked at aunt Maria. She looked shocked that I said it too. Oh crap. Maybe they won't ask how. " how?" Fuck. Now what is the plan. " oh here's novas first solo" Peter said directing them to the tv. They both watched and I sighed thank god. I don't think there gonna forget about that though.actually I'm surprised they even changed the subject so easily. I mean my first solo isn't that interesting compared to a broken leg. Or maybe they just don't care?

I never realised how many of these videos was me just singing and dancing. Like I really have always loved performing it's scary. For obvious reasons I coudnt continue with my childhood dreams of becoming a ballerina or a football player or been a gymnast. I did still play and take lessons occasionally but not as A serious thing because I can't. Literally but I do have those talents and I won't lose something that I enjoy. Maybe things could be cheaper in the state? If I get a job I can try and take more classes. I don't plan on going to college mainly because I don't wanna. Schools not my thing I hate it and I wanna do something that school can't teach. Oh wow I have a degree in using my voice what's the point of it just to be in debt? I did always wanna model professionally so maybe I could ask for Scarlett's help? I mean she's probably the best person to help me.

I got up and put Amelia in her bed upstairs for her to sleep. By the time I'd gotten back down it was now a video of me at a family wedding I was really young here and you can see I was upset. I can't really remember anything from this I look about 5? I dunno but it feels familiar I just can't remember what could of happened but I have an idea. " why we're you upset?" Ans I shrugged " I don't remember" I said looking at aunt Maria who looked sad " do you remember?" I asked her and she nodded she looked hesitant but I wanted to know " you wanted cake but when you asked you're ' mother' " she said in air quotes " she yelled at you for no reason so you started to cry. I took you for ice cream outside to calm you down" and I smiled at her she's always looked out for me " why did she yell at her over that?" And aunt Maria shook her head " I don't know but everyone was talking about it which made her more mad and she took it all out on her" and I nodded well nice to know that it's always been like that. I guess you could see I was just normal about it all but then the next clip strayed back sit was me laughing so we all looked at the screen. I had my red wig on and I groaned with embarrassment. This was peters older brother birthday and it was a superhero birthday. And we'll I'm dressed as black widow and I look cute but this is so embarrassing. " omg my baby" Scarlett cooed and I wanted to kill Peter for putting this in. " oh she's obsessed with black widow and scarlet witch" aunt Maria said smirking and I groaned of course she would put that out there. " no I'm not" I said and she smiled " you're comics say otherwise" and I went Wide eyed while Scarlett and Lizzie smirked at me " I might just have to see those" and I am glared at them " no you will not". My comics meant a lot to me and well I didn't wanna have them know that. I look like a proper dork then.

It was getting late and we'll I didn't know why but I didn't wanna go. But we had to because such things as sleep exists. But before we went aunt Maria gave Scarlett a box. It had my photos and copy's of those home videos " you didn't have to " Scarlett said to her and aunt Maria smiled and look at me " you missed some things but that doesn't mean you can't see them even if they are over" and Scarlett smiled they hugged and said goodbye. " be good for her she cares" and I sighed I can't tell her how I was feeling because she looks so happy for me to be happy. " I don't wanna go" I said and she hugged me " we're going to say a proper goodbye before you do but it's not the end we're going to visit you all the time. It's how you're life is and it's a new chapter." I smiled at her and nodded she was right even if I didn't wanna I didn't have a choice. Just the thought of being here is making me feel uneasy. Now It stresses me out and I don't wanna deal with any of it.

I feel ill but maybe it's the nerves. I have to meet her family like what if none of them like me. Then what do I do? Will she stop caring about me? Omg will she bring me back here? I have to protect myself no one else is going to do that for me. It's always gonna be me for myself.

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Remember to drink water
Eat a good meal

My messages are always open

Till the next chapter my loves❣️