Stuck At The 9th Step

LAST CHAPTER : SHINN ACE ASLEJO

#SAT9S

DEDICATED TO : KRIS RAFANAN

(Note : Don't mind my errors.)

LAST CHAPTER : SHINN ACE ASLEJO

"May I come with you?"

Anne looked confuse by my question. She was planning to go back to Phil and stay there for good. She graduated in Stanford years ago and now practicing pediatric field of Med. I, on the other hand, was taking the last requirement course on neurosurgery.

We remained friends and it's easy to kept in touch with her. We're still living in same circle, some of her friends are also connected to me, not to mention, her family is on the same line of business. I've met the Martins personally and they negotiate well. They are bunch of classy socialites and probably living on the same level of standard as the Aslejos. That lifestyle was nice and good enough to keep me yawning everyday, keeping me in constant of feeling of boredom.

I guess I'm also done with this kind of life. That's just a matter of luxury, anything which can be dealt by money. I may sound like a hypocrite who did not enjoy what wealth have been offering but honesty was never lost on me. I want to get away from here. This is already noxious.

It bounced back, huh? Should never underestimate the irony of life. I still remember the times that I'd been boasting about power, my obsession with freedom, the greediness that I naturally have, and many more things that concealed the true essence of living. I thought I already know what I want. How come I feel incomplete and lost these past few days? I inhaled deeply. I've been keeping these thoughts for quite a long time now. I've been wasting a great time on thinking. I couldn't believe that it has been a year. . .

I've been restless since I came back. I couldn't stay in one place. I was studying in Cambridge but I traveled from time to time, trying to find a place that I could call home. Yet, there was none.

It took me months before I bothered to visit Anne in California. We talked about a lot of things, about my awesome-but-fucked-up life, my unnecessary getaways, and about the things happened in Phil that forces me to go back here. Then, I realized that some things weren't on its rightful place and I've already lost my insights. The fucking situation that you have plenty of choices and I can't pick even one. Here I am, relying on my instincts and tolerating my impulsive side once again.

"You sure about that?" Anne sounds unconvinced. "I thought you want to cool down."

"I think a year is enough." I answered.

Anne focused her gaze on me for seconds, then she shrugged. "Baka hindi na ako bumalik."

I sighed. "I'll think about that."

Her grew wider. "You're kidding, right?"

"I've never been this serious in my entire life." I grinned. Trying to ease the tension in the air. I know she felt it, too, while I'm trying to be bleak as I hold my emotions,

"Why?" Confusion and worry laced on her gentle tone. "You're life is here. You've been living here since birth and-"

"And that doesn't mean I would live here forever."

"Then, why do you want to go back? Is it about Rhea?"

I didn't answer her. It's a no. I wasn't being denial, or maybe I was. I don't fucking care anymore. I'm not sure if she still remembers me. After what happened, I hope she prefers to forget for the peace of my conscience.

"Are you cool with her?"

"The right question is 'is she cool with me.'" I said drily.

"Of course." Anne stated undoubtedly which made frowned.