5sos imagines

You see his scars

(Please note that these imagines contain the subject of, and details of self harm, so if you're triggered by self harm or have been affected by it, please don't read this chapter)

Calum

I lay on Calum's bare chest, gently tracing his tattoos as his fingers ran through my hair. My fingers danced over his collar bone tattoos but started to wander down to his arms. He shifted suddenly.

"Y/N, stop." He spoke. I looked up at him.

"Why?" I asked.

"Just, please...don't trace the tattoos on my arms." He gulped.

"Why, Calum? What are you hiding?" I asked.

"Babe, just...just don't." he muttered. I sat up and took his arm in my hand.

"Y/N, no-." my breath hitched as I turned his arm and saw what he was hiding. Tears pricked my eyes as I looked at him to see him just looking down.

"Why?" I whispered as I gently ran my fingers over the scars.

"They're from ages ago...years ago...from secondary school." He mumbled.

"But, why didn't you tell me?" I choked.

"Because I didn't want you to think that I was still doing it. I didn't want you to worry. I haven't done it in years." He muttered.

"Look at me." I spoke. His eyes remained glued to his bed sheets.

"Look at me, Calum." I choked. He sighed before lifting his head and looking at me with watery eyes.

"I'm sorry." He whispered. I sighed before pulling his arm up and pressing my lips against the skin. He smiled gently at the gesture before I looked at him again.

"You're okay." I whispered.

"I'm okay." He nodded.

Luke

Luke smashed our lips together as soon as he opened the apartment door. Luke and I had been out drinking and we had both had one too many. Luke pushed me up against the door, shutting it as he attached his lips to my neck. I pulled at his jacket, pulling it off of his shoulders and he did the same to my jacket. He pulled my top over my head and peppered kisses along my jaw. I pulled my top over his head, but immediately stopped.

"Luke..." I muttered.

"Hmm?" he hummed against my neck.

"What are those?" I choked. He froze as he realised. I ran my fingers across the scars that lay on his lower stomach. He sighed as he pulled away, but I kept my hands on his stomach. I looked up at him.

"Why didn't you tell me?" I asked.

"Because it was a long time ago. That was my past, but you're my future." He spoke, gently taking my face.

"But, Luke...what happened to you to make you do that?" I choked. He sighed and looked down.

"It doesn't matter. But don't worry, baby, I haven't done anything like that in at least ten years, I promise." He reassured.

"Okay. I love you, okay? Always remember that." I spoke.

"I know, I love you too." He smiled before kissing me.

Michael

I stretched out on the sun lounger as I waited for the boys to come out. Luke, Calum and Ashton came out, quickly followed by Michael. I looked at him.

"Michael, it's like a hundred degrees, why are you wearing jeans?" I scoffed as he sat down.

"I just don't feel like wearing shorts." He shrugged.

"You're going to roast if you sit out here in jeans." I sighed, making him shrug again.

"Okay, what's up?" I asked, sitting up. He gulped hard, looking at the other boys. I looked at them.

"Guys, what's happening?" I asked, getting worried.

"Mikey, you should just tell her, she's going to find out." Calum spoke.

"Tell me what?" I gulped. He sighed before standing up and unbuttoning his jeans. He pulled them down and I gasped at what I saw. I looked at him in shock.

"There are so many." I whispered.

"Yup. It was bad." He muttered.

"I'm so sorry, Mikey, I didn't know, you shouldn't have had to-."

"Hey, it's okay, you would have found out sooner or later." He reassured.

"Are you okay now?" I asked gently.

"Yes. I have been for years." He reassured, giving me a smile.

"Okay." I nodded, returning his smile.

Ashton

Tears pricked my eyes as I sat on the sofa, waiting for Ashton to get home. As if on cue, the door opened and he walked in and sighed at me. My eyes drifted down to his bandaged arms.

"Hey." He muttered as he shut the door. He walked over and sat next to me before taking my hands in his.

"Why?" I asked, looking at him. He sighed.

"Things just got too much again. I'm sorry." He spoke, looking down.

"Your mum told me that this isn't the first time this has happened." I said, making him nod.

"It happened before, when I was sixteen. Things were just...awful and I found myself doing it." He admitted.

"But why didn't you tell me?" I questioned, making him look at me.

"I thought that you'd think less of me because of what I'd done to myself." He admitted quietly.

"Why would I think less of you? It's okay to have scars. Fair enough the way you got them is horrible, but scars mean that you've fought a battle, which you may have lost but you're still alive. You didn't let it defeat you." I choked, clutching his hands. He nodded.

"I'm sorry." He whispered. I sighed before resting my head on his shoulder.

"It's okay. Just promise me that you'll stop." I spoke.

"I promise." He sighed before kissing my head.