Captured Hearts

Already Touched

Disclaimer, Mentions of rape, Domestic abuse. Please read with caution

Caris

Once in the car Dean leaned over me, strapping me in, his hand gently on my thigh. I don't understand why, but I kept wishing he would hold me.

That was stupid, this hard man, my boss, son to the leader of the mafia, why would he hug me.

Why would he even want to hug me, me of all people! 

His maid, nothing more, nothing special.

He avoided eye contact with me the whole journey. I knew that he must think I lied about having not slept with random men, but that man wasn't random, he was my worst nightmare.

 When we were together for almost four years, things were not good. After the first year things changed, he didn't want to go out anymore.

He lost his job and became aggressive with his words. I would argue back, until one day I learned to keep my mouth shut, or he would shut it for me. 

He was there for me when my Dad was dying from cancer, I met him that very same year and he took away my sorrow.

Only after Daddy died, things changed and at first I blamed my depression, my greif. 

Then I realized it was him who changed, less than a year after my Dad died he was beating me! 

When I was not in the mood for sex, either too sore from his last punches or too depressed. 

He started to help himself, I left him but I still have nightmares of him. When I left him I was homeless and just trying to survive. 

It wasn't long after I met Dean, but I wanted to forget the past, but it haunts me!

As soon as we were back Dean stormed off and went out again, I fell to the floor crying. I felt so alone, so helpless. 

Hours must have passed before I pulled myself off the floor, I decided to have a bath, wash away Charlie's touch.

 I poured some bleach onto the rag and I scrubbed until my skin was raw. I felt dirty, tainted, ruined. Charlie found me and still tried to use me. 

My body has long been damaged goods. Tonight Dean saw that, he will never look at me the same.

After the shower I slipped into some comfy shorts and then I headed to the kitchen to make a cuppa tea.

That's when Dean came back, he looked surprised to see me, but it's not like I had anywhere else to go! 

I offered Dean a cuppa, I hoped that I could apologize for what happened, I knew I should have been more careful. He said yes and nodded so I went to make him a cup of tea.He leaned his arms around me to take his cup.

 I saw his knuckles and turned around to look at him. I gasped, they looked swollen and were coated in blood.

I look up, now pinned between his tall solid frame and the kitchen counter. I tried to refrain from biting my lip, I could smell his Dior, mixed with his own scent.

 I shook my head and led him to my bathroom, I still had all the bits that Danny left me to tend to my wounds that were now healing. I used Gauze to clean his knuckles, being gentle, aware that it stings, even though he doesnt once flinch.

Our eyes keep catching eachothers, then looking away. Why do I feel flutters in my tummy when those blue eyes catch mine off guard.

 He starts to caress my scar, and so I slide my fingers into his. I wanted to offer the same comfort in return to the comfort he offered me.