Captured Hearts

Shower Time

Dean

"Mother, how dare you come barging in, announcing my business as if that's your place." I snapped. I was angry to say the least, of course I was planning to tell Caris about the deal, and what that meant for my future. Well and her future if she chose to have me, not that I had even asked her yet. Now my mother may have just lost me my chance.

She's not likely to want to be my girlfriend now; she thinks I'm a liar, on top of all else. I didn't lie, but I hadn't told her, and that was on purpose. I didn't want Caris to feel like it was her fault, the deal was only made to save her and I would again, only I know she is the most selfless person that I had ever met, she knew I never wanted that life and now that I am stuck to it, I didn't want her to blame herself. 

I knew the day would come that I had to tell her, but I am guilty for wanting to have had more time with her. I wanted some time where there was no drama, no pain and I could just see her smile day in and day out for a while. Only I am starting to believe that I can't have happiness, it's not mine to claim. 

I sighed as Caris looked at me with big watering eyes, and my mother had sat beside her with her arms crossed, both waiting for my explanation. Only it was not meant to be this way.

"Caris I was going to tell you once you were on the mend, baby please let me explain" I pleaded. It was no use, she stood up and told me that she was tired, and needed to go to bed. "Goodnight Mrs Sorento" she said as she walked off, I heard her close a door from the lounge and my heart sank knowing with the creak from the hinges that she had gone to bed in her old room, I guess I had my answer as to whether she would share my room, make it our room. 

Mother raised her eyebrow "well I guess a whisky neat for two then" I rolled my eyes and headed to the kitchen, I took out the rubbish from our chinese take away and sighed. I poured a glass of whisky for myself and downed it. Then I poured both mother and I a glass and headed back to the lounge. 

We sat in silence at first "Dean, I know she should not have heard about it from me, but you should know by now, honesty is the best policy. my dear the sooner you tell her now the better." She downed the drink and got up, "I called a taxi, I will be at the hotel down brooke lane, I will come by tomorrow and see Caris. I do care about her Dean, I owe her so much for the pain my son caused her, but I also owe her for making my youngest boy a happy one." She kissed my head, while I sat slumped in my chair, twisting my tumbler and then left.

I sat for a bit, tapping my tumbler and having another whisky. I kept thinking about what she said, the sooner that I told her the better. 

I knew she meant in the morning, but I could not wait, I meant what I told Caris I didn't want another night of falling asleep without her. I put my glass down quietly, with a small clink as it met with the glass coffee table. 

I stretched, feeling tired from the alcohol, and was overcome with emotion. I needed to hold my girl, especially as when she knows, things will never be the same. With each step up the stairs, I felt my mouth grow dry, my hands become damp with sweat and my heart raced.

 I stood in front of her door, I didn't hear her snores, and she was a loud snorer, so I knew she must be awake. I go to knock but before I do I hear her voice, pausing in front of the door. 

"Dean, I know you're there, and we both know it ain't like you to knock. just come in already" I laid my forehead against the door, hesitant.

"Baby, before I do, I need you to know that I am sorry, I love you". There was silence. 

"I know, but we do need to talk, don't we?" I nodded as if she could see me. Then I responded to her invitation and entered.