Captured Hearts

Pulling pants down and chin ups

Dean

I need to be the man I am meant to be, I need to get my strength back. I can't get everything back that they took from me. I know the nightmares will always trouble me but I need to be the man I have always intended to become; strong! Caris deserves that much at least.

I have been working hard in the gym to gain back my strength and sure I know my muscles are repairing but mentally I know my strength is lost and I don't know how to heal. I just don't want it to be Caris' burden. I want to protect her, even from my own internal torture. I know she wants me to let her in but it hurts me every time I close my eyes and I can't let her hurt too.

I know I'm not actually angry at her but I am angry that she put herself in some silly situation. Yeah sure she rescued me and I am not shocked that my girl had the strength, intelligence and bravery to achieve that. Still she was stupid for doing it, it could have gotten her killed or worse!

I will always hold myself accountable for her coming so close to death, putting herself in harm's way for me.

I head to my fathers office before I go to the gym. It's another way I have been keeping myself busy, staying awake and keeping the nightmares at bay. He gives me jobs to do with his men in hopes that I can acquire new associates to move up and be made in under me 

We had found that in total nineteen men were working with Davide to betray me and help him step back in. Father shot the lot of them except Luke who I took some pity on. I know he stayed loyal to Davide but I know it was fear that fueled the loyalty. Fear for his daughter and wife's safety.

I offered Luke a chance to work for me and be loyal to me, in exchange we relocated his family to a place only I and he knows about. If he crosses me I won't harm his family but I will take him out and then his family will hurt. He doesnt want that for his daughter or wife and so I believe be will be loyal.

I made my way into my Fathers office and he was just pacing while on the phone. He has been trying to track down Davide, we know he will be coming for revenge but my father has no clue where he has been since his escape.

"Trovalo, non permetterò che mi prenda in giro in questo modo. È finito" he exclaimed angrily over the phone. He was angry and saying how he would finish him. I knew he was talking about Davide and I knew he had been working with the Bratva. He had connections and he was past the point of forgiveness for his own son.

I coughed and he turned to glare at me before ending the call abruptly and stomping to his seat behind his desk. "Sit son, I believe we have a lot to discuss" he said waving his hand to the chair in front of his desk.

I sat down while raising my brow in curiosity. What does he wish to discuss and why do I feel like a small preteen called to 'Daddy's' office again. I roll my eyes at the thought and wait for father to talk.

"We need to talk about that woman of yours, she humiliated me!" He said matter of factly.

"How did she manage to do that" I asked sternly while cocking my brow.

"She made a fool of all of us, you know women don't have any place in the mafia and she certainly knew it wasn't her place to interfere" he scolded while folding his arms.

My patience was growing thin. I was pissed off at Caris for putting herself in a dangers way but I was still amazed and impressed at her success in saving me. I guess you could even say I was proud!

"Listen son, you don't want a woman like that. You know one who thinks they can do what us men can. She has no right to step into our business" He said while shaking his head in disappointment.