The Simplicity in a Need

Chapter 44

The rest of the night went way to quick. My plan was simple. Leave while they slept. Bringing them into this situation should have never happened. I'm done being selfish being with them. They deserve better so much better than me.

We watched a couple movies and ate dinner before we all excused ourselves to bed. It was a wonderful day, don't get me wrong. I loved every moment of it but I knew I had to go. They had an amazing life without me. No one needed me. So that night at around 2am in the morning I sneak out of their house. The house that made me feel safer than I've ever been.

When I'm outside I look back and cant help but remember the first night I came here. I was in such bad shape. The change was to hard to miss. The night I met them i was falling apart, and now i was willingly walking away from the only people I have ever felt comfortable around with so much confidence its shocking.

They saved me that's for sure. So as i begin walking away i bring out my phone. I pull up our group messages with a sad smile before typing out my thankyou paragraph as well as my love confession. Then i immediately turn my phone off before taking off to the house i used to call home. I jog the whole way the paranoia already sinking in. What if he was in that alley. Twenty minutes away from the guys and I'm already panicking. I dont think to much about it though and just focus on getting back to me apartment. If i thought about it i would turn around.

When i spot my familiar apartment i begin full on sprinting to the entrance. I get in the elevator practically shaking. Thankfully as its so late no ones out. I breath heavily and grab at my chest in emotional agony. When the elevator finally opens i stumble out just to literally stand stock still in shock. My brain goes on autopilot as the man in front of me turns. Shock, pain, and exhaustion hits me at full force.

"Sup bro," Kyle says with and awkward grin and his hands deep in his pockets. He hasnt changed at all. His dirty blond hair is still in its familiar army cut. His eyes are a soft brown. One of the only things I didnt inherit from our father. He was just a couple inches shorter than me. Even his clothes felt the same. Light wash jeans and a way to big jacket.

"Kyle," my voice can hardly be heard as I breath in. I nod my head in confirmation. I look around in slight fear before getting to my door hurriedly. I unlock it quickly and usher him in. I deadbolt the door as fast as i can.

"You seemed freaked out," I hear him mutter and freeze. Before a laugh escapes me then I'm doubled over full on belly laughing. I look back at him with tears in my eyes.

"I am, I'm so fucking freaked out its not even funny. Seeing you is like seeing a ghost. The boy who said i was dead to him. The little brother who would rather die than see me again, the man who recently told me my worst nightmare is looking for me," I respond in a exasperated tone but i dont blame him. I never blamed the one person who got out almost completely unscathed.

He looks at me with so much pain and i remember that he now knows almost everything. He understands a lot better now. I sigh heavily and run a hand down my face, "Aron, I'm so sorry for what happened in that house. I'm so sorry i had unintentionally been apart of it, and I'm so thankful for what you did for me."

I shake my head almost violently, "I'm no hero Kyle. I was fucked over by evryone but you in that house. And i dont blame you for your rejection. You didnt know, and i wouldnt explain myself. I wanted someone to get out clean. That place was tainted and i wanted more than anything for at least you to get out without scars. I failed though."

"I was a child and felt left out, everyone in that house had secrets. I remember wanting nothing more than for you guys to just tell me what all the whispers were about. It made me angry when no one did, I didn't know my antagonizing words my life in that house harder for you. Then when you killed dad, I was so upset, not even because I loved the man but because you wouldn't talk to me. You wouldn't talk to anyone," Kyle trails off at the end of his heartbroken rant and I sigh.

"I shouldn't have pushed you away. Maybe I did more damage than good and I'm sorry for that. I'm so sorry for how terrible a brother I am," I start to apologize but he hurriedly cuts me off.

"No! I will admit back then I thought you were pretty shitty for leaving but now I understand. I get everything. He told me about everything Aron. Including mom and dad," Kyle responds quickly before catching his breath and continuing, "I understand every action you made now. And it breaks my heart that I hadn't been on your side. That I couldn't be there for you because I was to caught up in my anger that I couldn't see what was going on."

"Again, I don't blame you. I never did," I mutter as I look around a little paranoid. I did not want to be found by him. I look at my phone to check the time but find that it's dead, so I just shove it back in my pants, "you were the last sibling that I actually considered family. I want you to know that."

Kyle looks at me with a sad face and nods in response, "I still consider you family too, that's why you can't be here. He knows where you live! He was the one who told me."

My breathing becomes shallow but I just nod. I had figured at least that much, "I'm leaving, I was at some friends but I couldn't drag them down with me. They're good people who deserve better. So I'm just gonna leave town. I'll figure this shot out. You should stay away as well."

"No I'm done being the protected baby Aron, I'm not a kid and this time I will help protect you. Leaving town won't accomplish anything. You need to go back to your friends for a bit, you'll be safe there. He can't touch you while you there," Kyle tries to get me to stay but I just shake my head before a loud bang resides across the room. I scramble back as I look at the door. Another loud bang is heard. I grab Kyles arm and go to hide but another bang comes from the door and it comes flying open.