I am terrified of anything that can hurt me. I'm scared of anyone who could use me. Kyle is right I'm broken beyond repair but he was wrong about one thing. Maybe I am running away from pain but I really didn't want to hurt the guys. I really thought it was better if I wasn't in their lives and now I'm realizing that leaving abruptly can also cause them pain. Why did I think they would just go back to their previous lives like nothing happened. Because I just assumed they didn't care as much as I do. Even now, why can't I believe that people can love me?
I can only assume it's because I'm biased. I hate myself. So I expect everyone else to feel the same way about me. Was I wrong? Should I go back?
I grip at my head and groan loudly. A soft bang is heard and I shake my head. Why can't Kyle just leave. Go and live the life I worked so hard for him to get too.
I breath in harshly and walk out of the room, "Kyle! Kyle just go home! Go back to the life you had without this fucked up family!"
It's quiet for a minute as I get to the living room. I frown until a deep nasally voice speaks up from behind me. Sending chills straight to my very core, "so Kyle warned you? He made it seem like he despises you."
I quickly turn towards the man who stood with his back against the far wall of my apartment. However that's not what makes me freeze up. It wasn't even the fear I held towards the man. Nor was it the familiar khaki pants and button down that somehow holds in his beer guy. It's not his disgustingly greasy hair or his piercing dark brown eyes. No. It was the sight of of him nonchalantly holding a gun towards Matt's head. I gap my mouth open and quickly survey the rest of the room quickly. Where is Dean and Cedric? They would definitely be wondering where Matt is.
"I can see I was right. This pretty little guy is yours right," for the first time ever when Jeremy speaks to me I'm not completely terrified. In fact his words absolutely infuriate me.
"No, let him go!" My voice shakes and the start of a panic attack begins weighing me down and causes my breathing to stagger. He grins and shows of his chipped front tooth. Bile begins building up in the pits of my stomach. I was stronger now. There was no need to be afraid of him. I spent all these years preparing for this exact moment. For the moment I'd have to confront him again.
I glance at Matt to see he doesn't hold a shred of fear. In fact all his eyes dart around my face in absolute worry and deep regret pours into me. I'm so fucking stupid.
"Hey, old man? If you're gonna shoot me, you might wanna get on with it and leave, because a gun won't be strong enough to stop my boyfriend," Matt grumbles even going as far as leaning his head against the barrel of the gun.
"Oh is that right? Are you talking about our sweet little Aron here? Because the day he stands up to me is the day pigs start flying. Sorry to break it to you but no one's saving you," Jeremy whispers loudly into his ear and anger bursts through me as I see a flash of disgust in Matt's eyes. Before he smirks.
"Jeremy," I mutter almost vomiting. His gaze trails to me and he look of glee comes back.
"Yes, my little whore?" My eyes shut as I can feel the blade dig into my back. A feeling I always remember when called a whore. To remind myself that I was marked. That I'm owned.
"Let him go. It's me you want right? So just let him go, and I'll- I'll do whatever- whatever you want," I stutter violently but manage to keep eye contact with him. My breathing becomes even more labored.
He smirks and chuckles, "hmm I don't know. He's much cuter than you are. Maybe I'll just use him instead."
He probably thought he was just taunting me, or maybe he was trying to prove something. However all his words did was ignite the burning rage I have never been able to express towards him. So when he looks at me his eyebrows shoot up in shock as I glare harshly at him.
"Let him go and take me Jeremy, before the lid that has been sealed shut so long ago bursts open," I speak surprisingly calmly. Even to myself. My mind and body have already decided that I would do anything to make sure Matt did not get hurt.
"And what are you gonna do if I don't," he grabs Matt and pulls him closer and rests his head on Matt's. Who just flinches and attempts to struggle out his arms. Instantly I'm walking forward. No fear. Nothing. If anything I am excited. I continue to walk until I'm right in front of both of them. He pushes the gun closer to Matt's head.
Matt looks up at me in worry and my harsh expression softens, "I'm so sorry Matt. I never meant to hurt you and now your in this mess."
"Shut up! I don't wanna hear your mushy bullshit! How dare you threaten me? Did you think I'd never find you? You're mine Aron. I've trained you to be the perfect little cock whore," my gaze goes back to Jeremy's and still feel no fear. Instead I felt almost sad. Sad for the little boy who had been controlled by this man. For the life he didn't let me live properly.
"I told you that if you didn't leave Kyle and I alone that I would turn in all the evidence I have against you. But now I'm changing my threat. If you don't leave- no if you don't disappear from everyone in my life, then I will kill you. I'll show you exactly how you hurt me," I speak slowly and leveled. His face turns a splotchy red in anger and a small smile escapes my lips, "you know, I probably would have gone with you and let you do whatever you'd like to me if you hadn't decided to take a hostage. The cute little guy you're holding right now is the reason you lose."
"Did you forget who had the gun! I will shoot your precious little boy toy if you so much as try!" He shouts out and grips on tighter to Matt's collar. He chokes a bit and I glare at Jeremy. Before a smile crosses my lips.
"When I got out of jail I tried everything to feel safe. Learned everything about fighting. I know a bit of every martial arts there is. I'm a black belt in karate. I spent a few months boxing every kind of person. I also bought an illegal gun and learned everything about every kind. Anything that made me stronger than you," I continue to smile until it turns into a grin. Jeremy's face turns even more livid and he shoves the gun even further into the side of Matt's head.
"So! Try anything and he's dead!" He yells this and tries to step away but is stopped by the wall. The knowledge that he is attempting to retreat from me makes me confidence soar.
I shake my head and bring my hand up to cover my mouth, "I'm guessing you didn't do the same research."
He glances to the side and yanks Matt even closer. The nervous expression on his face like a drug. One so addicting I almost don't want to ruin this moment but when I hear a soft groan from Matt I know it's time to officially end this.
"The safety is still on isn't it?"
YOU ARE READING
The Simplicity in a Need
Romance(Book 1 in the 'Need Series') Aron's past ruined him. Turned his anxiety into his worst night mare and kept his fear alive every day. People call him a sex addict. Others say he's obsessed. No one knows that's it's a physical need. If he doesn't gi...
