The Perfect Storm 3

Chapter 233

I still don't know where my head is or how it is, or what it's thinking. I take a few deep breaths as Miles just watches me, waiting for me to do something, say something, but I have nothing.

"Are you sure you're right about this?" Miles's soft eyes look into mine and I nod. I have to be right, nothing else makes sense.

"I . . . I think I know who it is." My lips part and the words escape me.

"I think I've seen my father recently," I say to Miles, almost choking on the lump in my throat. He presses his hand on mine, knowing how much I need it, but I can't help but draw my hand back quickly. My heart is not racing as fast as my mind is but I feel it all over my body. I feel everything, it's as if all the puzzle pieces in my life have been put together.

"It has to make sense, the . . . the police officer . . . Peter, he has to be my dad." I almost cry.

"I . .. he came by and he acted so strange, so caring as if he had known me my whole life and he said he'd see me again and then at the funeral . . . I . . . I saw him he just watched me and he looked almost just as sad as I was. And then when I dropped my mother's letters in—"

"What?" Miles' wild hazel eyes sting me like a cactus strings the insects around it.

"You did what?" he repeats and I feel a little caught off guard.

"Did you read the rest? What did they say?" He asks frantically.

"no." I shake my head. "I didn't read anything beyond the first few," I explain and his face falls.

"Madison how could you do that?"

"Because some secrets aren't meant to be revealed, Miles. She wouldn't deserve that, that was her life and I . . . my life shouldn't become about digging into things she decided to keep from me, she did so with reason and I have to respect that, what f one day our children—" I completely stop. Beng around Miles confuses me much more than it should, it feels so right to be around him. It feels so right. And when I am next to him, I forget everything else, even that we aren't together or that we will never have children together.

The air between us feels too quiet and I can tell that Miles expected my words just as little as I expected them.

"God damnit, Madison." He whispers.

"Why does it concern you at all?" I offer angrily.

"You have no say in the things I do, especially when they aren't yours to speak on!" I practically yell but my voice is still shaky and unstable even though I try to fake the confidence I don't have against him right now.

"It does concern me, you can't just do things like that without me knowing!" Miles yells back and I feel so much smaller than I feel myself appearing on the outside even though clearly, even in Miles's eyes I know I look like I'm holding it all together with one string.

"Why are you so obsessed with those stupid letters?!" I scream, tears streaming down my face as I watch his eyes harden on me.

"Because maybe then you'd know why they fucked up and how we won't!" He yells just as harshly and realizes that all of the yelling was nothing but hurt. 

The air between us is thick and silent to the point where manage to hear the wind streaming loudly outside Miles's parked Porsche.

I don't know what to say, my mind is full of words but none of them fit into my mouth.

"I'm sorry." His eyes suddenly aren't on me anymore, he's picking at his knuckles before frustratingly running his fingers though his tousled hair that reminds me of an abandoned dark forest.

"It's, um . . . it's okay." I say shily.

"Are you sure about that guy being Peter?" He asks me but I'm not sure, I won't even be sure until I find out.

"Mhm." I shake my head.

"Take me back to my mother's house." I say, feeling the acid that the words bring my tongue, letting me taste the hurt I'll experience by being there again.