Worth falling for

Losing you before I had you

Emily:
I breathed heavily hoping Alison would get the hint that I was asleep. When I finally saw her shoulders relax into a deep slumber, I sat up.

"Alison?" I paused waiting for anything, the only sound I heard was my thumping heart.

Here goes nothing, "if I don't get this off my chest I won't be able to sleep. So, I think I'm falling for you. I don't know what it is about you but I feel like I've known you forever and I want to know you more."
I took a deep breath and turned back over and slept.
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I woke up expecting to find Alison next to me but I was shocked to find her side not only empty, but somewhat made. I figured she had just left earlier and so I got ready for school.

I pulled on some gray skinny jeans, rolled into capris and a striped blue shirt with a light jacket.

"Bye mom!" I yelled before I exited my house. I was excited to see Alison after we hung out yesterday.
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I pulled into school and saw Alison sitting alone by the big tree outside of school. I prepared myself to face her and started to head over to her.

"Hey Alison." I called out with a wave. She looked up at me, closed the book she was reading and hurried away.

That's weird.

I texted Ben asking him where he was. He told me he was by the english buildings so I went to meet him.

"Hey beautiful. How are you? You weren't answering me last night." He pulled me into a hug and I molded into his embrace.

"I had a friend over." I replied and he held my hand but it just didn't feel right.

"Listen, I'm sorry about yesterday. It wasn't okay for me to do that." He ran his other hand through his hair.

"You're right, it wasn't. Don't ever do that again." I said adamantly.

"Baby, it won't" he stroked his thumb over my cheek and stopped. I stopped with him and he kissed me softly. I let myself be taken away with the kiss and before I knew it, the bell had rung.

"I'll see you at lunch." I hugged him goodbye and headed to physics with Alison.

I hurried to class and saw Alison was already there. I made my way to her desk.

"Hi." I said awkwardly.

"Go away." She mumbled, not meeting my gaze.

"No." I replied

"I heard what you said last night." She looked me right in the eyes this time and my heart stopped.

"Ali, I-"

"Stop okay. You're just using me to play out your little lesbian fantasies. I'm not into girls." She spat out looking back into her book.

I didn't say anything, I was too in shock. I took my seat and cringed every time I thought of our conversation.
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Alison:
Emily looked so hurt but I was hurt even more. She had to know that I was awake. How dare she try to use me and play me like everyone else. I thought she was different and I thought she actually wanted to get to know me. She was probably just going to make a big joke out of all of this. I could see it now, "school gangster turned sweet, then ruined."

Yeah, not happening Emily fields.

Class went by slowly. I kept trying to avoid Emily's gaze and it took every ounce of self-control I had to not look back at her. She didn't deserve that.

After class Emily tried to catch up with me, "Ali, wait!" I heard her call out desperately but I just kept walking, pulling my ear muffs even lower on my ears.

It would be hard for me to get over my feelings for Emily but it was the better thing for me to do. I wasn't going to get hurt again.