It Came Upon A Midnight Clear

67.

His eyes widened and he stared at her for a moment.

"Derek, what are you doing here?" She asked, her eyes confused at his presence in her scrub room.

"My... my... my..." He muttered as he pointed into the room.

"Your what? Your surgery? This is an ob/gyn case... what are you even doing in here...?"

"My son!" He exclaimed, pointing into the operating room where they were prepping. "That's my son in there..." He exclaimed as he broke off eye contact and turned into the operating room. He walked right up to Meredith as she lay on the table talking, the nurses were trying to calm her, and all she kept saying was Derek's name. "Meri..." He whispered, immediately grabbing her hand, her head turned as she looked at him standing there.

"Derek..." She whispered as she felt her hot tears rolling down her cheeks. "Derek... help me..." She whimpered as they both looked up as Addison walked in the room.

"Alright..." She said as she stepped up to the end of the table, she looked up at the terror in Derek and Meredith's face as they just stared at one another. His hand was gripping hers so tightly and their eyes never left one another's. The nurse was rattling off the vitals and any information that was needed from what had happened in the delivery room. "Patient's name?"

"Meredith Grey... twenty three years old..." The nurse said loudly.

"Grey... as in...?"

"Yes!" Meredith shouted. "Now please just help our baby... please!" She screamed at Addison, tears rolling down her eyes as she stared at Addison as she immediately started the surgery.

"Shh..." Derek whispered as he held Meredith's head, kissing her forehead. "There's no need to yell... they'll get him out...they'll get him out, baby... he'll be okay..." Derek whispered as he held Meredith the best he could.

Addison stared for just a moment at Derek, at the man that she had thought she had known, a man that she had dated for years and who had avoided her like the plague since their breakup years prior, only seeing her quickly in the hallway or if one of their surgeries overlapped. He rarely spoke to her and never, ever mentioned that he was seeing anyone, let alone having a child with anyone. He was so frightened as he held the tiny woman in his arms, his voice shaking and so scared, and when his eyes met hers, she could feel him pleading to help her, to help their child. Addison took a deep breath and made the incision.

Derek positioned himself so that Meredith could see him. "I don't feel him..." She whispered as she whimpered.

"They numbed you, baby... you're going to be alright... they're going to get him out... just focus on me... just focus on me and we'll get to see out little boy in no time." He whispered as he watched her try to smile through the stress and pain.

"I love you, Derek... I love you so much..."

"I love you, Meri... more than anything in the world, I love you."

"I hate you too... you know that I hate you too, right... for doing this to me..."

"I know you hate me too..." Derek chuckled as he brought her fingers to his mask, where his lips were.

"I love you and I hate you... you don't mind do you?" She asked as she tried to concentrate on him and only him.

"I love you and hate you too..." Derek laughed as he watched her give him a look of surprise.

"You can't hate me... only love...only love, Derek..." She whispered as she felt a sudden pressure and she tried not to break eye contact with Derek when she felt the movement of the doctors as she just looked at him.