Rough Heart | ethan dolan

[six - cleaning the mess]

It's hard to watch as Ethan continues to punch Charlie.
"How could you hit her! She had nothing to do with this, she's a girl!" Ethan yells in Charlie's face.
"I... Didn't... Mean to..." Charlie mumbles in-between punches.
Sarah runs over to me, checking my face.
"Jessica, I'm so sorry! So so sorry!" She cries, her hand on my cheek.
Too much is happening right now. I am speechless.
Sarah suddenly runs over to Ethan and begs him to stop. Ethan doesn't listen, as always.
But, finally, Sarah does the only thing she can think of, and collapses on her knees. Literally.
Ethan finally pulls away from Charlie, and takes a few steps back. Charlie slides down the wall and lands on the floor.
"Sarah," Charlie reaches out to her.
Sarah almost gags as she stands up.
"Don't touch me, ever, ever again." Sarah walks over to me for a second time and sits down before checking my cheek once again.
"Ethan? What's going on?" Grayson, I think, yells from downstairs.

Please don't come up here.

I hear his footsteps running up the stairs, and close my eyes. I then hear Grayson enter the room.
Sarah squeezes my arm.
I barely open my eyes to see Grayson's face in his hands.
"What happened?" He calmly asks.
Ethan remains silent.
Charlie suddenly erupts from the ground and struggles a bit to stand on his two feet.
"Jess, I am so sorry," Charlie looks as if he's about to cry.
Ethan clenches his jaw and I can tell it takes everything in him not to slam Charlie up against the wall again.
"Don't call her Jess," he breathes, trying to stay calm, "and get the fuck out of my house."
Despite my useless state right now, my heart still flutters for some reason.
Charlie, not daring to say or do anything else, slowly exits the room and pushes past Grayson.
Sarah sniffles, trying hard to fight back her tears.
"I came here with him, I guess I should go talk to him." Sarah says.
"No, I can take you home. Don't worry about him." Grayson, picking up on what happened, offers Sarah.
Sarah nods through her tears.
"Thank you."
Grayson shoots Ethan a look before him and Sarah walk out of the room, leaving Ethan and I alone.
Ethan paces back and forth as if he is unsure of what to do. He runs his hands through his hair an unusual amount of times before slowly approaching me, still on the ground, and sitting next to me.
His worried eyes study my face closely and his thumb traces the spot that Charlie hit. He carefully brings his other hand up to cup my other cheek.
"This is all my fault," he breaks eye contact and looks down at the floor. One of his large hands remains on my face, while the other falls down into his lap. He continues to rub small circles around the sensitive spot Charlie hit.
I take a moment to notice the damage Charlie did to Ethan.
Ethan has slices all over his face which are surrounded by blood, making my heart break.
"No, it's his fault." I tell him.
He looks up to meet my eyes once again.
"I am so sorry, Jess," he wraps his arms around me and embraces me. My head rests on his broad shoulder, and my sensitive cheek presses against his. I take it all in, appreciating every moment, and appreciating this side of Ethan.
"Why didn't you fight back at first?" I whisper.
"I told you, I don't want to scare you." He replies.
My head starts to spin.
"He busted into my house and started to punch me, saying that I turned his own friends against him. He told me how you two talked this morning," he adds.
I sigh.
"You stood up for me, Jess. All I've been is a fucking dick to you, and you still stood up for me."
He pulls away and looks into my eyes, taking my cheek in his hand once again.
He leans his forehead against mine.
"I worry about you, Ethan. So does Grayson, a lot." I don't really know why, but I tell him.
He nods, causing his forehead to rub against mine.
"Don't worry about me, Jess," he repeats words he's told me before, "I'm not worth it."
His sentence breaks my heart.
Anne suddenly appears in the doorway and widens her eyes as she stares at the damage done around Ethan's bedroom. Ethan pulls away abruptly, sending a chill down my spine from his sudden absence.
"Is everyone okay? Grayson texted me to not go upstairs, but I couldn't help it. Are you both okay?"
Anne rushes over to Ethan and I.
I force a smile at Anne, but it probably looks pathetic. I awkwardly hold my face with my hand and look at Ethan.
"It's okay. I'll take care of it," Ethan tells his mom, looking up at her.
Ethan stands up and reaches down to help me. I grab his arm and pull myself up.
"Let me help you, dear. I'll go get ice packs, I am so sorry," Anne insists, her worried face looking at me.
I can't help but think that she's probably used to doing this, taking care of Ethan after he gets into fights.
"No, I can handle it," Ethan refuses.
"You need to wash your face, dear," Anne cringes as she looks at it. She carefully touches Ethan's eyebrow, where one of the deepest gashes is located. Ethan winces, causing Anne to gasp.
"I'll clean all of this up, don't worry." He promises his mom.
"We can press charges against this boy, he can't just come into our house like this." Anne rests her hands on her hips.
"Mom, it's okay. Let me handle all of this, please don't worry." Ethan continues to try and convince her.
"At least let me go get you both some wet towels and ice packs, I'll be right back. I'm so sorry this happened."
Aren't we all.
-
"Let me help you."
Ethan grabs the ice pack from my hand and gently presses it against my face. I pull back slightly.
"You have to ice it for at least fifteen minutes, it will keep swelling if you don't." He informs me.
Ethan and I stand in his bathroom, various towels and ice packs surrounding us on the counter by the sink. It was hard to get used to my reflection in the mirror. I almost screamed when I saw the gash below my eye, on the very top of my cheek. It's nothing compared to Ethan's face, though.
I press the cold pack against my face, glad to finally be feeling some relief.
Ethan sorts through the mini first-aid kit in front of him, grabbing a bandage and cutting off a small piece of it. I watch as he then applies some sort of cream looking substance to some of his cuts.
"Does it hurt?" I blurt.
He glances over at me to make sure I'm still holding the ice pack against my cheek.
"Not really. I've gotten used to it," he answers before placing a bandage over the worst cut on his eyebrow.
He then takes some of the cream in his other hand.
"Put this down for a second." He commands, grabbing the ice pack and placing on the counter in front of us.
"Sit up here," he pats the counter space next to the sink.
I hesitate a bit, but finally listen to Ethan and jump up onto the counter. The counter is cold against my warm legs.
"This won't hurt." He says.
I still wince as he carefully rubs the cream in his finger over the cut on my cheek.
He hovers over me, standing against my bent legs. I feel slightly awkward sitting on his bathroom counter, but his calm gaze and caring gestures help me forget I am even sitting here.
I admire the way he is doing this, being so thoughtful and helping me take care of the damage Charlie did.
When I first met Ethan, I would've never guessed I would be sitting here, in his bathroom with him.
I cringe when I remember I first saw Ethan in the bathroom with Samantha.

Does he like her?

I don't like him, but I don't the thought of him with her either.
I couldn't like him. He gets in fights and is mean to me and my friends and is not someone I should be associating with.
But I can't help the way my heart beats ten times faster when he looks me in the eyes. Especially now, as he hovers over me and carefully attempts to take care of my cut. He is so attractive, there is no denying it.
I am so attracted to this mysterious, troubled boy, and I have no idea why.
He proceeds to place a bandage over the cut on my cheek and gently presses it.
"This should help it." He says lowly.
He averts his attention from the bandage and stares directly into my eyes for a moment.
I take this time to admire his almost hazel, golden brown eyes and their beauty.
"Are you okay?" He asks.
I nod.
"Are you?"
"I'm fine, Jess."
For a second, I think he may lean in and kiss me. But he leans back, away from my legs and begins to collect the trash left behind from the bandages.
He takes a towel and cleans his face one last time before closing the medical kit in front of him. I realize I'm still sitting on top of the counter.
I jump off and see Grayson standing in the hallway.
"Hey, are you okay?" Grayson repeats his brother's previous question.
"Yes, I'm fine. Just shocked,"
"I'm so sorry, Jessica. Charlie is absolutely crazy."
He walks over and embraces me into a hug. I take in his warmth and kindness.
"It's okay. Ethan put a bandage over the cut, it should be okay. It wasn't that bad."
He pulls away and furrows his brows.
"He did?" He asks.
"Yeah," I say with equal confusion.
Is that weird?
"Oh, okay, good. I'm glad you're okay."
"Was Sarah okay?"
He sighs.
"Not really. I tried to talk to her but I think she just wanted to be alone, so I just dropped her off at her house and told her if she needs anything to call one of us."
"You're so nice." I say without realizing.
He smiles at me as Ethan walks out of the bathroom. He stares directly at Grayson.
"Hey, what the hell happened?" Grayson asks his brother.
"I'll tell you later." Ethan says.
We all stand in silence for a moment.
"I'll help you clean your room, Ethan. I don't want mom to see it." Grayson offers.
Ethan shoots me a look, and I know immediately that he doesn't want Grayson knowing that Anne already saw it.
"I'll help too." I tell them.
"No, no. You've cleaned too many of Ethan's messes. You need to go home and rest, maybe talk to Sarah." Grayson suggests.
I nod, realizing he's right.
"Alright."
"I'll walk you out." Grayson says, placing his hand on my lower back.
"No, I'll walk her out." Ethan grabs Grayson's hand and pulls it away from me.
Grayson laughs at his brother and jokingly raises his hands in the air in defeat.
"Are you sure you're okay to drive? I can take you home and you can come get your car another time," Grayson says.
"I should be okay. Thank you, though."
"Text us if you need anything." Grayson smiles at me.
"I will."
Ethan, shooting Grayson one last look, then places his hand where Grayson's was and starts to lead me to the front door.
"I'm sorry this happened, dear. You'll have to come back over another time when a random boy doesn't barge in and beat up my son." Anne says, attempting to lighten the mood as I walk out of the door.
I laugh lightly.
"Okay."
She grabs my hands with hers.
"Let us know if you need anything."
This family's kindness never ceases to amaze me.
"Thank you."
Ethan then cuts his mom off, shutting the front door and walking onto the porch with me.
"You're sure you're okay?" He asks.
"I'm fine. Thanks for the bandage," I point at my cheek.
He laughs. I love when he smiles, it's so beautiful. He doesn't do it enough.
"I'll text you." Is the last thing he says before disappearing back into his house.