Rough Heart | ethan dolan

[seven - helping ethan & finding a note]

I am afraid of what my mother will say or how she will react as I pull into the driveway of my house. Dreading of what's to come, I take my time walking to my front door.
"Jessica Lane Perkins!" are the only words I need to hear from my mom to know that I'm in huge trouble.
I awkwardly smile at her.
"You cannot just barge out of the house like that! I was so worried about you and Sarah, where did-" my mom stops for a moment when she notices the bandage on my cheek.
She widens her eyes and slowly walks over to me. She takes her index finger and brushes it across the bandage.
"Jessica, what happened?"
I sigh as her worried eyes scan my face.
"I'm okay, mom."
"Where did you and Sarah go?"
"Ethan and Grayson's house, they're twins and they just moved here."
My mothers eyes widen even more, if that's even possible.
"Jessica, not only did you run out of the house without telling me where you were going, but you went off to some boys house that I don't even know about?" She scoffs.
"And then you come back with a huge bandage across your face, what am I supposed to think!" My mom begins to pace around the room.
"Mom, it's not what it looks like. This was an accident," I attempt to explain, pointing to my cheek.
"You know what, Jessica," she starts, "I don't even want to know what happened. All I know is that you are never going back to that boy's house ever, ever again."
"Mom, I was helping a friend, that's all!"
"I don't care. You're never going back to that house."
I want to tell her that it was Charlie who did it, but I don't think it would be a very good idea. My mom would probably want to talk to Anne about what exactly happened and help her press charges against Charlie. She would make this whole thing an even bigger deal than it already is.
"I'm seventeen, I can make my own decisions."
"When it comes to your safety, I make the decisions." My mom crosses her arms over her chest.
"Ethan and Grayson are nice boys, mom. I promise you." At least half of my statement is true.
My mom laughs, making me feel ridiculous.
"They're all nice at first, Jessica." Is all she says before exiting the room, leaving me standing alone by the front door.
-
Ethan and I didn't talk very much in our first period this week as I had somewhat hoped we would. I had also failed to speak to Sarah the entire week, which was selfish of me. I should check up on her and see how she is doing.
On Tuesday, after the whole incident, Ethan leaned over towards me about halfway through Mrs. Jones' lecture.
"Does it still hurt?" He asked me.
I brought my hand to my face and held the bandage lightly for a moment.
"Not really."
He nodded and then leant back over to his desk.
I noticed he became very frustrated with his work, considering the fact he missed the entire week before. He would glance down at the paper, but would never write anything down.
Grayson texted me later that day, asking if I was okay. I smiled and texted him back, saying I was just fine.
On Wednesday, Ethan and I didn't say anything at all. I still noticed his frustration, and almost leaned over to offer some help. But I chickened out.
Also on Wednesday, Lilly came over. I told her about everything that happened and she had never been more shocked in her entire life. She also said she thinks Ethan might be into me, but I doubt it. I've been thinking about it ever since, though.
On Thursday, I finally gained the confidence to ask Ethan if he needed help.
"You look like you could use some help," I whispered to him.
"I'll figure it out." He replied, not taking his eyes off of his paper.
I was disappointed, but decided to not let it bother me. I don't really know what I expected, anyways.
Today is Friday. I silently sit in my sixth period desk, waiting for the bell to ring, as I always do. Lilly begged me earlier to go to the bonfire with her this weekend, claiming that she misses them because we skipped the last one.
There is no way I am going, though. I have had enough of them.
The bell finally rings and I rush out of the classroom. I jostle through the congested hallway of obnoxious students and try to reach my car faster than usual.
Without realizing, I zoned out for awhile. I hurriedly just walked quickly to my car.
Ethan's voice behind my breaks me from my temporary daydream.
"Jess," he calls.
I turn around, almost surprised to see him.
"Yeah?" My voice comes out sounding stupid.
He takes quick steps to catch up to me. He carries two textbooks on his right side, his large arms almost consuming them. His hair is slightly messy from the windy air around us, making him look even more attractive than usual.
"My grade in Pre-Cal is shit."
His abrupt statement causes me to laugh, a little too hard.
"I was going to help you yesterday, but-"
"I know, I know. I said I'll figure it out, but this shit is hard as fuck, I can't do it."
I laugh at the way the cuss words roll off of his tongue so effortlessly. I don't even think he realizes they leave his mouth.
He looks me dead in the eyes, which never fails to make my heart beat faster.
"So, are you saying you want my help?"
He sighs.
"Yes."
I giggle.
He runs his hands through his hair, pushing it a certain way. I watch in admiration.
"Are you going to the bonfire tonight?" He asks.
"No, are you?"
"I'm not allowed, remember?"
Yeah, I remember.
"Yes,"
He shifts back and forth on his feet.
"If you don't have any other plans, could you come over tonight and help with me with this useless shit?"
I am shocked by his offer.
He wants me to come to his house and help him? It doesn't seem like something Ethan would do. I guess he must really need the help.
I remember how my mom said I can't go to the twins house anymore. I'll just tell her I'm going to the bonfire.
"Jess?" He interrupts my thoughts, catching me off guard slightly.
"Um, yeah, I can do that." I feel myself blushing, and I hate myself for it.
He lets out a breath.
"Okay. I'll, uh, text you." He says before darting off in the other direction.
I can't help the butterflies that erupt in my stomach as I finish the walk to my car.
-
"I can't believe he invited you over." Lilly says through the phone.
"It's not anything special, Lilly. He needs help with Math,"
"Yeah, yeah. Okay." I knows she's rolling her eyes on the other side of the phone.
"Hey, how's Sarah doing?" I change the subject.
"I haven't heard from her this entire week. We should probably check on her soon, maybe tomorrow?"
"Yeah."
"I haven't even seen Charlie at school," Lilly says.
I sigh.
"Neither have I."
I guess I need to talk to him, too.
"Well, I'll talk to you tomorrow. Let me know how it goes with Ethan,"
I laugh.
"Alright, bye."
I hang up the phone and notice I have a message notification. When I realize it's from Ethan, I fight back a smile.