What you know (Hamilton cast)

One

"Kelsey!" Neil says, walking over to my vanity. "How's performing on broadway the first time?"

"Incredible." I say, taking out a pin. I'm out of my costume now. They had to fix it up to fit me. They said that it was originally fitted wrong and it had nothing to do with me but It still made me feel bad. Now I'm wearing a red sweater and some jeans. Much more comfortable.

"You're not looking at yourself again." Neil is the only one that's noticed that I avoid mirrors when I can. I hate getting ready in the morning or a show because of them. Why does it always have to be me looking back at myself in my reflection. I suppose some people have noticed but no one has confronted me about it.

"So what? I'm too tired to care how I look."

"Exhausting isn't it?" I nod, agreeing. There's a knock on the doorframe and everyone in the small room looks over.

He tells us that it was a great show and we did a good job. I'm the only one who just has my first show in here so when his eyes land on me, I hope that's why and not that he's decided to fire me.

"Congrats of your first show, Kelse. Good job." Besides the twenty thousand notes I got.

"Thanks." He beckons me into the hallway.

"I meant what I said at the audition."

"I'm fine. I can handle it." He smiles. Convinced.
-
3rd POV
Kelsey say in the studio apartment, leaning against the door. The show would pay rent. Not him. Not anymore. She stared out the window at the moon that lit her bedroom.

Doing it all herself was never selling her body to strangers. She thought she could do more after her boyfriend cheated on her. She thought that she wouldn't have to do such a thing. And now, she wouldn't. But the memories of all her childhood and the last two years of horrible jobs that made a living hurt her. At least she wasn't completely starving but she was mad to spend money on food instead of anything else. She'd stopped and ate what she had for a week. A little less then usual, especially when she ran low, and going to buy more had been a mix of excitement and sorrow that she would waste money on something that she didn't think she needed much of. Healthy foods costed more, yes, but they had a better use.

Her buzzing phone startled her. She reached forwards and grabbed it off the floor.

Kelsys POV
Phillipa: hey, Jazzy, Ari, Betsy and I are going out for drinks. You wanna come?

Me: im nineteen

Phillipa: then don't get alcohol. Just come along. Jazzy and I will be at your complex in twenty.

That was not asked. That was a 'come' but I figure, why not, and pull a sweater on over my sports bra. Then leggings and I brush my hair out. When I get down there, the two of them are between the sets of doors, talking.

"Hey, baby girl." Jazzy says when she sees me. I haven't spoken to the two if them very much yet but they treat me like a little sister.

"Hey." I say, quietly.

"Oh my goodness, do you have a coat?" Pippa asks me and I cross my arms.

"Yeah. Um, I did. It's at my boyfriends place. I think."

"Should we stop and get it? I'd like to meet him."

"No- no, we shouldn't. I don't know if it's even there."

"Give him a call." Jazzy offers advice. I shake my head again.

"We broke up." There faces change from worry to a mix of sadness and pity. "Where are we going?" I ask, changing the subject before they can full on pity me, ask questions, or decide that I'm too sad. We start there, silently. Jazzy puts her arm around my shoulder. I really am sad. Pippa looks around my neighborhood and I can tell that she doesn't like it. She takes out her phone, types something and then puts it back in her pocket.

"Come on. We'll be late." Pippa says, taking my arm to speed us up, probably to get away from here faster. We don't resist. When we get to the bar, I stay mostly quiet and sip my coke since I'm not gonna drink anything tonight. Not here. Not with them. Even if my tolerance is pretty high.

"So what about you?" Pippa asks after finishing a story about high school.

"What about me what? What school I went to?"

"Like, where you grew up. How you got interested in musicals. We really don't know anything about you yet. So anything."

"Oh. Well, I'm from Brooklyn and I got intrested in musicals through my mom before she passed." God, Kelsey, why are you so sad?

"I'm so sorry."

"It's cool. My dad got arrested so I eventually got put in a family that helped me peruse my dream the best they could." The second half wasn't so sad. "Until they died." God, Kelsey, shut up.

"Again, I'm sorry."

"Also fine 'cause then I moved in with a good friend and- and yeah."

"And? Don't be afraid to tell us. We've all had our struggles. We're artists in New York."

"We dated. He beat me. And then cheated on me." That's more then I ever wanted to say. I also slipped many years of foster care. "And I can't have kids from injury. I don't know why I told you that." Phillipa wraps her arms around me and pulls me against her shoulder.

"Don't worry. You're employed. You're on broadway. And trust me, we are not the most serious type of people. Just a family that you are a part of."