Remorse

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Ignore the mistakes 🙏🏻

The dark night was going to be too dark for a certain someone. It was heart breaking, body wreaking and emotion shattering night. Several heart broke, many lost and it was the dark night that was ready to engulf every broken heart and let them cry on its chest, be that comforting shoulder that many of them needed.

Ironic right? We do sin in the bright day light, we break promises under the bright shining sky yet we cry in darkness, we cry in loneliness, where there is no one to hold us but it's still peaceful, maybe it's just us and us alone that can carry the burden of our deeds as well as collect and rebuild under this heavy darkness.

Walking away from something is easy? Is it? Well, we heard alot, just move on....walk forward and do good.

It's not that easy, there's always something that hinders us, that pull us back to what we are today, to what meant to be left but we can't leave it. And yet every time we see someone in pain, we give that shitty advice to move on, bro. Forget what happened.

That's not easy damn it!!

It's particularly human nature that you don't forget what you actually want to forget, and it stays, it stays and damages you till deep, till there is no trace of happiness and when there is only darkness left and yet you find confort in it, cry your heart out and till the bright light shines at you again, your rebuilt it, you rehearsal the act of smiling and smile oh so brightly.

But is the past or your deeds gone? Does that smile mean you have won our your darkness? NO. Dark, Black absorbs the light and once it enters somewhere, it doesn't leave until everything is dark and then, a single step of darkness can taint the bright sheet of happiness in no time.

A curse you can say.

The boy who had his crumbled self, curled around on the street bench, close to the light pole, sniffle again. It was his darkness that was taking over, well he already was in darkness yet he felt the same agonising pain penetrating his body again and this time with a lot more intensity.

Is that really who he is? No, he is a bulky, egoistic, arrogant bully who trouble people and don't feel shame, don't feel guilty. That's how he rebuilt himself but why is his well build self crumbling now? Why is he lacking the ego and arrogance that he had and how could tears and emotions replace them so easily?

"Stop." The lousy whisper flew but died down soon, before anyone could heart it. It wasn't meant to be heard by anyone but by the boy himself.

"Stop hurting me." His hands reaching to his ears, pressing the organ forcefully and harshly to stop that shrilling voice from entering his ears. Pool of tears begging for mercy yet he couldn't get it, just like he never listened to his victims, his abuser wasn't hearing him.

"Go away. You are locked, so how——-stop coming back to me. I don't want———" the boy squeezed his eyes shut. Maybe he just has to close all his senses down.

But he didn't know, closing the eyes will get him to his nightmare faster than anything else.

"Cone out, come out boy." The kid hear the most disgusting voice. He hates it.

"You can't hide from me. Look, I brought you banana milk." The elder voice said again. And with the foot steps being so close, the boy shrunk himself even further with the wall.

He had his hands on his eyes too tightly. But he can feel the single dull ray of light that was running under the surface of bed alone was joined with the bunch of the other rays making it illuminated enough that his weak and scared self was exposed to the dark and furious orbs.

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