Second Snapshot (Picture This Sequel: Niall Horan)

-Hollow secrets & bleak mornings. [Chapter 60]

CHAPTER SIXTY- Hollow secrets & bleak mornings.

The stone was cold against my bare skin as I leant against it a considerable amount away from the smokers. The concrete was slowly numbing my bare feet since the recent removal of my shoes. I was planning on sticking out the outfit I didn’t exactly like for the sake of it being what Elise wanted us to wear. But that was before the actual marriage part of the wedding was called off as she so proudly announced that she was ‘in love’ with my boyfriend. It was an understatement to say I got jealous when girls flirted with him, so I really didn’t know how I felt about her thinking she was in love with him. But somehow I just wasn’t convinced. I know she takes things a lot lighter than me, but concluding that you’re actually in love with someone is a huge thing. Love is a strong word. Even she should know that. And then to announce it front of me? For my own ears to listen to. That’s something else.

I slowly rolled my gaze across the clear sky, the moon shining down a pearly beam stretching across the gardens, the stars dotted so randomly yet to strategically around it. It was a beautiful night, too bad I wasn’t exactly in a very happy mood to enjoy it in. But I guess it was just kind of mandatory for me feel that I couldn’t exactly see him right now. It wasn’t the present that bothered me, because I knew that he didn’t have something going on with Elise at the moment. Even if Elise’s words contradicted this I just somehow knew it. He told me that the only girl he was interested in was me, I believed him, and I still do now. I just need to wrap my head around the fact that it may not have always been like that.

I watched as a small billow of smoke drifted in wispy motions in the air the lingering aftermath of an old man’s cigarette further up the wall. I had tried to distance myself from the smokers but unfortunately, as same goes for everything tonight; the wind was blowing my way. Tipping my head back slightly I closed my eyes as the cool night air swirled around me in slow and calm motions. But I wasn’t feeling calm. I wasn’t feeling anything at all. I knew I needed to talk to Niall, I probably needed to talk to Elise too, but I didn’t have the courage to do that. And I would talk to Niall, just not right now. Right now, I needed to clear my head, but that wasn’t exactly working very well for me.

A chilly whisper of wind slid it’s icy finger across my bare skin dancing droplets of icy temperatures onto me. But I wasn’t even feeling the cold; I was already too numb with confusion. I just didn’t understand. Why? Why Elise? Why now? Why Niall? Nothing ever seems to be on our side, however much we think everything’s going to be okay. It never quite is, there’s always something else willing to mess things up again, willing to throw everything into an oblivion of lost hope. I wasn’t going to fight with Niall over this, I almost genuinely believed he had done nothing wrong. I hoped he hadn’t, he told me that he has and only ever will be interested in me and I believe him. The present is not my worry, it’s the past. It’s not supposed to matter, but it does.

I felt a presence beside me and opened my eyes to see my best friend beside me. I hadn’t seen her in months so her being here at this wedding was really nice for me, for us, but unfortunately the circumstances as usual, weren’t on my side, but they never were. She exhaled heavily as she tucked a strand of her dark straight hair behind her ear and pursed her ruby red lips and then rubbed them together running her tongue over her teeth.

“It’s cold out here.”

She absentmindedly observed folding her arms over her chest she leant forward looking past me to the smokers who were now passing a joint between them.

“Hm, maybe I should go and ask for a drag of their smokes.”

She joked, I looked at her and then nudged her in the ribs with my elbow shaking my head, she just laughed.