The Sapphic Christmas

25th December. part 1

Sophie

We managed to leave my parents' house and stayed overnight in my apartment. The hardest part wasn't to get rid of my mother and grandparents, but from Annabelle, who didn't want to lose her chance to become friends with Ella. However, we'd insisted that we needed to talk to each other, in private.

I still can't believe out feelings are mutual. I mean, we haven't talked much about feelings, but we don't have to. Why spoil our personal paradise with words? I don't want this at all.

"If we don't go to bed now, Santa won't bring us presents." Ella giggles, jokingly pushing me away as I've reached for another kiss. "Soph." She giggles again. "If you don't calm down now, you'll go to sleep on the floor." I raise my eyebrows, a-la: "Are you sure that I'll go to the floor to sleep in my own house." But then I think that she probably doesn't see it, because it's too dark to see anything in here so I repeat words form my head. "Okay, let's just go to bed now, I really mean this." She kisses me soft.

"Okay. Merry Christmas, Ella." I hug her from behind, wrapping my arms around her waist. I'm not the big spoon usually, but it's nice with her. The girl is so warm that I know that I won't sleep that night. I kiss her on the temple, I think she has already fallen asleep, although her heartbeat hasn't calmed down.

"Merry Christmas, Sophie." She answers to slowly, smoothly strake my hand, as if drawing something, and these movements immediately remove all the tension from my body. A day ago, I was losing hope to get text back from Ella, and now we're lying in the same bed and wishing each other a Merry Christmas. Could I be happier?

Falling asleep, I think that we should talk. We should discuss our expectations for each other, our goals on life. I hate these talks, but I want to do it with Ella. I want to have real, serious relationship with her. I want to know everything about Ellie, about her family.  Was that a one-night thing or we're dating now? I hope the second one. There're many questions, but I don't have enough power to think it over.

In the morning I wake up alone and, to be honest, I get a little scared. Was it all a dream? Did she leave me alone? Then I hear a noise in the kitchen, and there's new box under the tree. After yesterday's visit to my parents, I have no gifts left in the house at all. I'm a little embarrassed that I don't have anything for Ella, and most of the shops are closed now, so the only thing I can do now is to say that the gift will be later.

I wrap myself in a blanket and go to the kitchen. Ella's standing by the sink, humming something under her breath. I make sure that she doesn't have anything cutting in her hands, and hug her from behind. Her skin's cold, and it's covered with goosebumps from my touch. I love her reaction. She snuggles into my arms.

"Good morning." Ellie turns her head halfway towards me and kisses my cheek. "Shall we go somewhere for breakfast?"

"Good morning. Yep, it sounds good. Do you know any places that are already open?" I turn the girl to face me, turning off the water. Yes, that's much better. She doesn't have to wash the dishes in my apartment. Why don't we not just relax, lie down for a little bit.

"I hope we can find something in London. Nevertheless, there may be a Scrooge that will make someone work on Christmas, we just need to find such place." The girl puts her arms around my waist, partly wrapping herself in the blanket. She definitely got cold, so I distribute the blanket so that there's enough for the two of us.  We kiss again. I've never been kissed so much in my whole life, and I don't want to stop. "Have you opened my present yet?" I shake my head, and the girl make a face full of surprise. "Come on, I want to see you open it."

"Wait." I put her back under the blanket, cuddling on the way to my bedroom. "I have nothing for you." We walk into the room. I'm not going to let her go out of the blanket. I don't want her to get sick now. Well, she's the only present that I need.

"What about the painting? I love it so much, it's amazing. Don't think I like it because I'm selfish. Well, maybe it's one of the reasons, but not the main one. So don't worry about bullshit and open the present."

"Okay, okay." She looks cute when she's fake-angry.

We sit on the couch in front of Christmas tree and TV. I open the box, and there's another box, which is stuffed with chocolate and an old model of camera. These're the cameras my parents used when I was born. I didn't know that it's available to but now days. For a long time, I've wanted to try to take photos on such a camera.

"Thanks." I hug her, kiss her on the cheek. We snuggle for a little more. "I know where we can eat for free now, and it's not far".

"Where? At your parents' house?"

"Yes, they asked to visit them in the morning. They even offered to spend Christmas day with them." I shrug my shoulders. Everything went well yesterday, so there's nothing to worry about yet. I'm curious about Andy's Christmas time, we haven't spoken since the last evening. "If you don't want to, I'll call on them later."

"No, no, I want to, but... Won't that mean that there're too much of me in your family?"

"I think mom will be happy if there'd be more of you in my family. She likes you more than me and Will put together." It's true, Mom already adores Ella. "And I'll introduce you to grandparents closer, they're very cool." Besides, I would like to see them know that I also prepared small gifts for them, but I did not talk about it. I "What do you say?"

"Let's go. Isn't it too early?" She points to her watch: eight.

"I hope it's not too late, maybe children have already raised the whole house." The girl laughs. We quickly pack up, I give Ella my clothes, because hers is still dirty. My jeans are a little big for her, the sweatshirt, which is small for me, fits Ella perfectly. I feel like we live in "couple goal". That's the dream. When we're dressed, we go to my parents' house.

"Do you have plans for the New Year?" Ella asks, turning the radio up loud enough to still be able to talk and not scream.

"Not at all. Do you have?"

"Nope. Do you want to celebrate together?"

"I'd be glad." I smile and think that there's still almost a week until the new year and we could spend this time together, but then I've remembered about the trip that would begin on the twenty-seventh. Of course, it's good that we'll be back on the thirtieth, but I don't want to lose any more time. "What do you say if I invite you to out-town weekend with my friends, is that not too much?"

"A little..." I interrupt the girl:

"What if it will be my gift to you for the New Year?" Yes, I really want to spend time with Ella, but also, I'm a little afraid to stay with my former classmates. It isn't easy for me, especially since it's a bit awkward to be around Andy. We're okay, but it's unusual situation. Plus, I think he'll bring William as he's plus one.

"I'm happy to go, only if your friends don't mind." I've promised to ask them later. There's such an unpleasant feeling in my chest, as if I'm really imposing myself on Ella. In fact, if it's not for her broken car, she wouldn't have stayed here. At the same time, I understand that this's not true. If Ella didn't want to have me in her life, then she'd have already found a way to leave.