as you wish

69

irl

they both skipped that day of school, and the next, and the next, and every single day for the next several weeks. the only time anyone could get kaia to leave her room was to go out to grab food and bring it back to the house.

kaia couldn't even bring herself to hangout with nick, seeing his face just reminded her too much of matt. she stayed in regular contact with nick and chris, they would just only see eachother when chloe was dropping people off.

kaia's new car sat in her driveway, being driven only 2 or 3 times since she got it. the appointment to get it wrapped pink was 3 days after her and matt broke up, she forced her mom to go for her because she couldn't bring herself to leave her own room.

atleast the overwhelming dreadful guilt about matt couldn't hurt her within the comfort of her own room, that's what she had originally thought before she spent those weeks in there all by herself thinking about him in every waking second she could.

her reasoning for breaking up with matt was that she felt guilty for hurting him when they didn't talk for a few months. the whole james situation made her treat matt pretty poorly when it first happened, though matt did contantly tell her that he had let go of it and that he was just happy to be with her.

however, her guilt from that began to fade as she would get updates from nick about how matt was doing, now feeling guilty for leaving him and making things worse. they were both declining at a pretty rapid rate.

matt almost completely stopped driving, he only went out to put on a fake smile, film a car video or a vlog, then go back to rotting away in his room. not for one second being able to shake the thoughts of her out of his head.

only once every other week were nick and chris, with the help of justin, able to get matt out of the house and do something with them, he completely avoided kaia's whole neighbourhood and area.

besides the occasional exception, matt and kaia both stayed in their rooms all day every day. she felt him becoming more like a stranger again, she consistantly wished she had just explained her feelings, not broken up with him to "protect" him from things he wasn't even feeling.

matt called kaia one more time the week they broke up in any attempt to salvage something, but it didn't work. he basically asked if she wanted her things back as a way to try to get her to talk to him, anything for an ounce of her attention.

she told him to keep everything and to hold it close to him if he was sad or missing her. she hesitated to even offer his things back, just praying that he would let her keep all his clothes and gifts, which he did.

she cried to him on the phone that day, apologizing for everything. she cried so hard she ran out of air and he could hear the pain and struggle in her voice, she would stop talking every few seconds to cover her mouth and try to breathe through the obvious panic attack she was having.

she eventually forced herself to hang up because she didn't want one of his last memories of her to be her crying on the phone.

before she hung up that day, matt just sat there listening to every word that came out of her mouth, he was crying silently and only spoke if she asked him a question or if there was a silence that he filled with "i love you" to which she sorrowfully replied "i love you too".

in any other circumstance, he would've corrected her to not say "too", but he felt the drift beginning. he felt them grow further and further apart and the soul crushing reality of them becoming strangers for the second time hit him like a train.

that was the last time they spoke. that day was the last conversation, it was entirely too awkward for either of them to come up with some excuse to reach out to the other, though neither of them ever blocked the other one just in case.

even though kaia and matt both left up the photos of eachother on their instagrams, the fans quickly caught on to the breakup. the fact that both of them stopped posting, that kaia completely stopped being in any of their videos, and the fact that they completely avoided talking about eachother online.

matt didn't get near as many as she did, but they both recieved death threats, invasive dm's, and rude people in their messages demanding they not break up, and calling them names and insulting them when either ignored or told to mind their own business.

kaia also hated what this whole thing was doing to willow, she missed matt so, so much that she had to convince her mom to facetime him once a week.

willow would sit on the couch holding anne's phone on facetime with matt for an hour a week, and even at now almost 5 years old, willow knew better than to bring up kaia, she only wanted to talk about matt, anyway.

50 long, dreadful, awful, grief-filled days had now passed since they spoke a single word to eachother. after the one week mark, anne encouraged kaia to finish off the school year online so she'd at least get to graduate. matt had enough credits that he just gave up on school, he knew he'd graduate anyway.

as one would expect, they both fell into very deep depressions, there were points where matt barely wanted to see nick and chris knowing that they were still able to talk to her.

nearly an entire week of those 50 days kaia spent in bed, her bedroom door locked. she didn't get out of bed, so she didn't eat anything. and since she wasn't eating, she didn't need a bathroom.

there really isn't a healthy way to stay immobile for a week, not eat anything, and not use the bathroom at all. on the sixth or seventh day, anne had enough and took kaia to the hospital because she had passed out in the hallway when she tried to walk to the bathroom to pee after eventually drinking out of her week old water bottle.

kaia thought a hospital was a tad dramatic, but her mom suspected at very least a bladder or kidney infection due to lack of any use or movement of the body at all. not to mention how her entire bottom half turned purple when she stood up because she had been laying horizontally with no blood flow for a week.

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