10 - this isnt your fault

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i ran down the corridor and into the bathroom and locked myself in one of the cubicles. i couldn't breathe. tears were streaming down my face, my heart was pounding out of my chest beating at 100 miles an hour. i pulled out my phone, my vision blurry from all the tears. i entered my password, but my fingers were trembling. i messaged matt. i needed him to pick me up NOW.

matt❤️❤️❤️

You: matt
You: are you up
You: i'm having a really bad anxiety attack i was wondering if you could pick me up
You: i feel like i cant breathe i feel like i'm dying
You: i'm so so so scared
You: i'm sorry if i'm disturbing u i just cant do this
You: i ran out of my lesson

i knew he obviously wasn't up. it wasn't even 11am yet. i was freaking out, how would i escape this hellhole school now?? i couldn't walk home, it was still pouring with rain. i couldn't ask one of my parents either, my dad was at work on the other side of boston and my mom was probably running errands, and i didn't want them to worry about me. i knew i could trust matt though. he had anxiety too and always was able to calm me down and let me know it's okay to feel what i'm feeling. he really understood me and cared about me. there was just something about being in my brothers presence that calmed me down instantly. i just needed to be with him right now.
i resorted to messaging nick, because i knew he would be up as he would probably be heading back from alahna's now, and i'd get him to grab matt.

nickkkk<33

You: nick
You: are u back home
You: pls can u wake matt up
You: if you're there

to my surprise, nick responded so quickly.

nickkkk<33: Yeah I just got back home
nickkkk<33: What's wrong? Is everything okay?

i started crying even more.

You: no not at all
You: i need matt to pick me up i'm having a horrible anxiety attack i ran out of my class i cant breathe i feel like i'm dying

nickkkk<33: Oh baby it's going to be okay I
promise
nickkkk<33: I'll go wake up Matt right now. He'll come pick you up as soon as he can okay sweetheart?

You: thank you so much i love you so much

nickkkk<33: I love you even more
nickkkk<33: I'll brb don't worry I'm not going anywhere 🫶

You: okay

nicks pov
i was fucking worried about my sister after receiving those messages. i really really hoped she was okay. she hadn't had a bad anxiety attack in ages, that i was aware of. the last time matt had to pick her up from school early because of an anxiety attack wasnt since march.
i went upstairs to matts room. he was still asleep.
"matt, wake up" i said, jolting him awake. he groaned, still sleeping. "matt, wake up it's important!!"
"no nick, go away" matt murmured, turning over to face the wall.
"matt!!" i shouted, hitting matt hard on the back. matt turned over, looking at me in confusion.
"what the fuck was that for? i'm trying to sleep"
fucking annoying kid.
i showed matt the messages from maddie on my phone. he squinted, looking at the messages.
"oh shit" he said, still reading them.
"i think she messaged you too. poor girl" i said, feeling horrible for my baby sister.
matt continued to read them for a few more secs, before getting out of bed.
"i'll pick her up" matt said, walking over to his closet to put on some clothes. i stayed still, thinking.
"do you need me to come with??" i asked.
"no, it's fine. i got it all under control" he replied, putting on his black pythia hoodie. he put on some black nike tracksuit bottoms as well, as i was just worrying about maddie.
"i'll head out now" he said, picking up his phone and leaving the room.

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