maddie sturniolo: the triplets younger sister♡

47 - lisa

(next day, maddie's pov)
it was the next day, and me and my mom were in the car to go to lisa. i was super nervous, and i had butterflies in my stomach. my leg was bouncing, but i kept reminding myself of everything matt said, and it made me feel a bit more at ease. my mom sensed my nervousness and held my hand as she continued to drive with the other hand.
"i promise you, once you meet lisa you're not gonna worry. she's fabulous" my mom smiled, as i smiled weakly back.

we arrived in the car park of the place, or whatever it was, and got out the car. i was still feeling super nervous, but as we made our way into the building it was very.. i don't know what the word is, like calming?
there was a receptionist, who obviously recognised my mom, and greeted us with a warm smile.
"here to see lisa?" she asked.
"yes, please"
she typed some things on our computer, and then got up to lead us to wherever lisa was. we walked down quite a few corridors, but we had got to the end of one of them and we stopped at a room. the woman knocked on the door.
"come in!" a voice said, from inside the room.
that must be lisa
me and my mum entered the room, and i was pleasantly surprised to see that she looked like a lovely woman. she looked like she was in her early 30s, and had blonde hair tied up in a ponytail, and wore glasses. she greeted us with a very bright smile which made me feel a slight sense of relief.
"hello! you must be maddie, it's so nice to meet you!" she smiled, motioning for me to come and sit down on the empty chair opposite her. i turned to look at my mom.
was she not gonna be in here with me?
"i'll be waiting for you downstairs, i'll see you as soon as you're done" mom smiled, patting me on the shoulder before leaving.
shit
what if lisa killed me
i turned back to lisa, knowing she was definitely not gonna kill me. someone like her looked like she would never hurt a fly
"come" she softly spoke, as i hesitantly sat down in the seat opposite her. "so, you're matts little sister"
i nodded
"yup"
she smiled, nodding too.
"how are you feeling? your mum mentioned a few things to me about having some issues going to school and being by yourself, so like separation anxiety i'm assuming. am i correct?"
i felt like i should be scared right now, but the way in which she spoke was very calming, like matt. and she made me feel like i was in a safe space.
"yes, you are" i replied.
"tell me about that."

(45 minutes later)
the session was coming to an end, and i'm gonna be honest, it was nowhere near as bad as i thought it would be. my family were right, lisa was a miracle worker. and i felt like a weight had been lifted off my shoulders for sure. i was looking forward to our next session which was supposed to be on wednesday after school (if i even end up going to school). it was sunday now, so that was still quite a few days away but i didn't mind. i was really excited to tell my parents and brothers how good it went.
"goodbye, maddie! have a great week" lisa smiled, opening the door for me to leave.
"bye, thank you again" i exclaimed, heading down the corridors to find my mom, who was sitting on one of the sofas. she smiled, excitedly, when she saw me looking so cheerful.
"so how was it??"
"it was great, she's great. i feel great"
mom laughed, putting her arm around me,
"let's head home now" she concluded, as we headed back outside and to the car, with me feeling way less stressed and anxious than before.

(at home)
we arrived back home, and i walked into the living room to see my dad on the couch, watching tv with trevor. his expression lightened when he saw me
"was it good? how'd it go?"
"it was great!!!"
"amazing!! so not as bad as you thought?"
"definitely not"
"brilliant"
i laughed at my dad, then ran up the stairs to tell matt. him and chris were in matts room, with chris lying on matts bed on his phone and matt at his desk playing fortnite or whatever. they both turned to look at me as i entered.
"matt, you were right, i love lisa already" i said, plonking down next to chris.
"i told you, maddie, she's fucking awesome" he smiled, very focused on his game. "so you're feeling better than you did earlier?"
"one hundred per cent"
i saw matt smiling as his eyes were glued to his screen, but chris looked very confused. he didn't know who lisa was or that i had gone to see her.
"who the fuck is lisa??" he muttered, clearly confused
"she's my therapist, maddie went to see her earlier" matt explained.
"oh, that's nice" he replied "i'm glad it went well"
i smiled, and then hung out in matt's room for a bit just chatting about life before i headed to my room to call macy.

(5 mins later)
"maddie!!" macy greeted me from the other end of the line. i laughed
"hey mamas" i joked
"shut the fuck up mads"
i laughed, happy to hear she sounded happier than normal, as was i.
"how was the therapist??" macy asked.
"it went way better than i thought it would. thanks for asking" i grinned. "and you? how's nebraska been since i called you less than 10 hours ago? has it changed much?"
she shook her head
"nah, i wish." she chuckled. "schools just been getting worse and worse, but it's fine, because it will be spring break soon"
"true true" i replied "are you gonna come to boston for spring break?"
"i hope so, as long as my parents aren't working 24/7"
"macy, even if they are, i'm sure my parents wouldn't mind you staying here with us, everyone in my family misses you so much!!"
she smiled, a very grateful smile.
"i know. and as soon as i find out what's happening, i'll let you know. don't worry, ima come back to boston as soon as i fucking can."
i laughed.
we chatted for a bit longer before it was time for me to eat dinner, we just ate some pizza, and i was getting pretty tired so i headed to bed.

when i got into bed, i remembered what lisa had told me earlier, regarding how i found it hard to sleep alone;
"maddie, i want you to try something for me. tonight when you go to bed, if you feel scared or alone, just close your eyes and take a deep breath. then, imagine your brothers surrounding you, holding your hand and telling you that everything is going to be okay. they love you and will always be there for you, no matter what, even if they're not physically there with you. remember, you're strong and you are capable of taking care of yourself."
i smiled, getting comfy in bed. that was some really good advice, and i was gonna try it.
i lay down in my bed and got cosy underneath all the blankets. the room was very quiet, and all i could hear was the slight movements of my brothers next door, or trevor walking up and down the corridor, but even that was super silent. i began to get nervous at the silence, but then i remembered what lisa said. i closed my eyes, and imagined my brothers were in the room with me, telling me everything is going to be okay.
and i promise you i tried, but it was impossible
i got out of my bed and headed to matt's room.
fuck, i thought tonight would be different