You asked
What was the scariest part?
I said loving you
Knowing I could be hurt...
I asked you
Were you going to be honest?
You told me
Ima always be 100...
You lied
In that very moment...
I asked a simply question
Like how long we'll last?
You grabbed my hand
Pulled me close and promised
To never let go...
There goes another lie
Looks like there's another chick
You're making those same
Promises too...
I was lost in your eyes
And needed to feel connected to you...
You kiss me ever so softly
Hand and hand
And led me to the room...
Do you trust me?
I told you
I couldn't trust you
To me you were a boy
I barely even knew...
Was this real or fake?
You said you loved me
And broke down
My barriers
Now I'm laying here
Impregnated...
Why you acting weird?
I told you I loved you
You were my first
My only...
You been thoting around?
You called me a slut
And said
I smashed the homie...
How do you know?
I looked at you and held my breath
You gave me an ultimatum
Saying
Its either me or the baby...
With that being said
You turn
And vanished
How would I allow myself
To be so damn green?...
I sat there that night
Dead inside
Knowing I couldn't lose him
So I'd lie and avoid
The alternatives...
You gave me money
To get the abortion
I held onto it
Saving it for the
Magical punkin...
You started to notice changes
And began to ask questions
Why you getting fat?
And all I could do was to dismiss em
Basically pissing on them...
You were out in the streets
Slanging crack
Selling weed
While I was out preparing for a baby...
You came home one night
Pissy drunk
You slammed me hard
And knocked me
Unconscious...
You started tearing shit apart
And found the
Magical pumpkins diapers...
You sat in front of me
As I'm laying slumped up on the cold floor
My eyes began to flicker open
You tossed
Our babies clothes
And I knew I just made a serious mistake
Bitch...
You said you'd get rid of it
Picking me up
And pulling me by my hair...
I'm screaming
Praying my next door neighbor
Would hear
And come running....
How could you do this to us?
I loved you bitch
Smacking me to the face
As I screamed louder...
You throw me
Damn near knocking
The TV off the wall
You walk up and began to kick me in the stomach...
By then I had been
8 solid months pregnant
You grabbed the rest
And began to toss it out the
Window...
I'm screaming louder
Then there was banging at the door
You yank me up
I spit blood and you kick me
Over to the door...
I look back at you
Your eyes are a nasty shade
Of the devil
I wipe blood
Unlocking the door
Stepping back
To answer...
Our next door neighbor
Bust throw the door
Oh no
Not this fucking fire fighter...
You press your lips together
Forming a tight bond
You try to strike him
Missing ending up
Hitting me in my shoulder...
He swings and hits you
In the that one puch sends
Rapid chills down you spine
Causing you to drop like a fly...
There you were
Choking on your own teeth
Cops rush in
And they gather me...
Who would've ever known
I would've ended up
With my damn
Next door neighbor the fire fighter
Naming our baby boy
After him
Calling him Ryan...
Jr.
Never wanted for anything
A spoiled ass baby grew
Into a spoiled ass teen...
Your father found you
And you began
To ponder
And quickly put two and two together...
Why we didn't we have an answer?
He filled your head
With a bunch of bullshit lies
And you aloued him...
He took you on a heist one day
And unloaded a clip in your direction
You dipped out
Knowing
You just made some serious mistakes...
He left
Praying he left some holes in ya...
The cops came to get my baby boy
All I could do was cry
Ryan might as well have said goodbye...
They questioned him
Question after question
He finally snitched
Giving them him
And teaching him a lesson...
His father was behind bars
Ryan wanted to better his future
He took a good look at life and knew
He'd follow behind
The man who raised him
Ryan grew into the man his mother
Always knew he could be
Working hard
And loving every part
Of being that fire fighter...
Ryan was determined
To have a future
Getting rid of the past
And all it held...
This cycle never was
To be ever repeated
