You Are Mine Forever And Always

48 ~ You?

Wishing everyone a late Happy New Year! Stay blessed my lovelies 😍 This chapter is dedicated to my lovely friend sweetpari254

Manik's pov

How magical was the day we first met,
Life survived beating the darkness around,
A will to live sprouted once again,
But the flame was extinguished,
Darkness once again casted it's black magic on love,
Everything ended except my love for her!

She left me. My love left me once again! Why me always? I was aware of this fact but it would come so soon was shocking. Why me Nandini's Aiyappa? Why do you let me live through such tough times? Why don't you kill me all at once? Why this slow poisoning of my systems?

Brushing asides my tears, I strolled down the empty streets of Paris late at night with two beer bottles in my hand. Some passers by did give me a cursory glance, probably taking me in as a roadside drunkard. If only they could understand the turmoil churning my inner being like a sugarcane machine churns out the juice. The pain was unbearable. Thoughts of standing before an approaching vehicle did cross my mind. I had nothing to live for. Everything has been snatched away from me. I had no one to care for me. Still something stopped me.

The thought that she would come back to me deterred me from ending my life. Why didn't she listen to me? Okay! I know she was hell angry on me. Why wouldn't she? I lied to her at every step, hiding all major facts about me. It wasn't her fault at all. I was responsible for everything. I broke her trust.

She loved me from her heart and soul and what I gave her, was just emptiness. I broke her heart twice. It was not like she would wait for me, listen to my reasons when rage clouded her mind. I knew this day would come and she would leave me one day. My past would separate us. Then why the hell was I crying?

I deserved this. I deserved every bit of pain that pierced through my heart just like hundred swords make deep wounds on the skin. I wasn't supposed to cry. As everytime I had been responsible for everything that has happened in my life.

Yes, I was a smuggler, an illegal bike racer and a fighter and most importantly a murderer. But trust me I did sell drugs and raced and fought illegally because I had to earn money, quick money you see. My disappearance was mainly because I had to earn a lot of dollars for financing this trip. I knew I had lied to her but I couldn't reveal my real identity.

I had hid those things from my love because I knew she couldn't digest the fact that I was engaged in evil things and to top it a bloody killer. I had committed a couple of murders in just eighteen years of my life. Why would a girl love a murderer? I didn't deserve the love of an innocent soul. I was a monster in disguise of a human.

Nandini deserved a beautiful human not a vile monster like me. Atleast she would be happy without me living her fairytale with someone else.
It was easier said than done, right?

I gulped down the last drop of the alcohol and smashed the bottle on the floor crying in pain.

"Nandini!" I screamed.

Perhaps the breaking of the bottles on the concrete hid the sharp cry of my throat. Taking a deep breath I walked towards the only opened bar to fill up my system. I wasn't full yet. Ordering one glass I perched on the stool, checking my phone with a hope that she would call me back.

Hope! Why do we have hope when everything's finished? Such a stupid man I am! I laughed at my state and sipped the beer.

She was so happy. I was damn happy with my love. Who knew it was just a filler phase in my dark world! I remembered that day, my sixteenth birthday! I wish that day had never come. We separated forever! I was myself responsible for losing her.