What I never knew I always wanted (Robsten story) -ON HOLD

72 hours

  Just close your eyes
The sun is going down
You'll be alright
No one can hurt you now
Come morning light
You and I'll be safe and sound

Don't you dare look out your window, darling.
Everything's on fire
The war outside our door keeps raging on
Hold onto this lullaby
Even when the music's gone
Gone  

-Taylor Swift (video above)

72 hours... that's how long it had been since Kristen and Rob had seen Eliana. looking at the clock it mocked her. time mocked her, it was the enemy. the more time that went on, the lesser chance of finding Eliana alive and she knew that.

Frustrated, she got up from the kitchen island and threw her cup into the sink, listening to the porcelain crack and shatter into pieces. she leaned over the sink gripping the counter top until her knuckles turned white. her breaths were coming out jagged and fast paced as once again tears clouded her vision. it didn't take a genius to figure out what was happening to her, she was going into a panic attack. it had been so long since she had had one, but she still remembered that she only had a few minutes until she wouldn't be able to speak anymore. loud, gut wrenching screams that came out sharp and broken took over her body as she slumped down to the floor, burying her face in her hands.

Rob, having heard the screams. got out of bed and followed the screams down to the kitchen. he found Kristen on the floor and it triggered flashbacks of when she used to have panic attacks constantly. she had been doing so good.

"Kris, it's me" he whispered. "breath sweetheart breathe."

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Curled up on the couch, Robert was stroking Kristen's hair as she slept with her head in his lap. she looked peaceful. after this morning events, he was more worried about her than usual. he had made a new rule that she was not to leave his sight and if she wanted to go out, she needed to let him know she arrived safely, at least until this nightmare was over. it was for her safety.

A couple hours later Kristen awoken and decided to head over to her mothers for the day, she needed to get out of the house and she had not seen her mother since that night and now that Jules was out of the hospital, she thought it would do some good to go and see her. she packed what she needed and promised Rob she would text him when she got to her mothers.

"Hey, Kristen" her mother greeted.

"Hey, mom, I'm sorry I didn't call first. I just needed to get out of the house for a little while"

"Its ok, I'm glad to see you! still nothing huh?"

"Not a fucking thing." Kristen went and sat on the couch, sending a quick text to Robert as she relayed the events of the last two days and her feelings to her mother.

"I miss her mom......"

Jules got up and sat by Kristen pulling her into her side as she sniffled and continued.

"This isn't your fault mom, I hope you don't think it is."

Jules sighed. "at first, I thought so, but then your dad talked some sense into me."

"Do you talk to dad?"

"We might be divorced sweetheart but that doesn't mean we stopped talking."

"I guess...."

The day went by slowly, she and her mom spent the day cooking and talking. Kristen felt calmer than she had been and she didn't know if it was right to feel like that or not. her phone rang on the counter next to her, sporting her special ringtone that was just for Robert They don't know about us by One Direction filled the room, making Kristen's heart stop. she quickly wiped her hands off and grabbed her phone, heading into the living room. Jules couldn't hear what was being said on the other end of the line but Kristen's expression gave her all she needed to know