A LEAP OF THE EARLY BIRD

She would be his...

Dreams that come to us at night are a reflection of matters that affect us during the day. Dreams may be haunting. Dreams may be inspirational. Dreams may make us contemplate what the inner self is hoping for us to process. There are also those kind of dreams that make us want to continue that dream, for in that dream we can be who we want to be and who we want to be with - without having to explain ourselves or hold ourselves to the limits set forth by the world of reality.

Can was hurt. He was restless. Nothing helped. Nothing offered any kind of resolution for what he was feeling. He opened up for the first time in his life. He took a chance. He let his feelings be known to Sanem. And he could not believe his efforts were rejected. His feelings were rejected. His heart was rejected as well. He knew life dealt cards as it chose, but he could not fathom why he was dealt this painful of a card. Fate was fate, but why did it have to hurt so much?

He met with Akif. He needed to. Akif knew him. He did not have to explain himself to him. And Akif knew something was not right, because Can seldom asked to meet just to talk. To Can's surprise, the first question Akif asked was whether it was about Sanem. How did he know? But he knew. Akif's second question raised Can's temper. He asked what Can did to her? Of all the questions to ask, why was it assumed he did something to her. Why couldn't it have been Sanem who did something to him?

When they met, they sat in silence. Akif knew when Can needed his space, and when he just needed companionship. Can was not the type of a man who spoke openly about what troubled his heart.  He'd ask to meet, but not to speak. Can's heart simply did not know how to confide in others about sorrows troubling him. And Akif knew that for Can to be affected to that much of an extent, meant that he may not have been too far from choosing to escape his sorrows rather than facing whatever brought him that much pain. And he was not far off on his assumption, because he had never seen Can more distraught in his life.

Meeting with Akif didn't do anything except make him feel worse. So he decided to run. He ran for miles. He ran for hours. And he ended up by the embankment. In the very spot Sanem told him to leave. He sat. He thought. He remembered. And he hurt more now than ever. To get his mind off his thoughts he looked around. The Maiden's Tower glistened with its lights along its wateredge. The stars shined and sparkled right down on the Bosphorus. And he felt as alone as each of those stars. Surrounded by others, but never truly close enough to feel complete. So he looked down, for looking above made him think of the nights he looked up at the stars with Sanem. Suddenly, what caught his eye was something that reminded him of Sanem. He swore to himself, but hoped it was what he thought it could be. The bandana. Her bandana. And it was. He held onto it as if holding it closer and tighter might make a difference in his life. And it did. Because he now would get to hold a piece of Sanem, not only in his heart, but in his hands as well.

The moment he found the bandana had proven to be a very powerful moment that day, and in his life. So powerful that he dreamed of Sanem for the very first time that evening. He had dozed off, exhausted from running. And he dreamed of her. Sitting close to him. In his arms. She looked stunning. Clad in white, she looked like an angel. A morning bird shining her light in the evening moonlight. She was looking at him. She was smiling at him. She was as secretive and mysterious as ever. And as alluring and feminine as he imagined she could be. She pulled him in closer with her sensuality, he pulled her in closer with his words. But she stopped, would not budge. He asked why, she did not answer. He asked why she asked him to leave that day on the embankment? She answered. And her words hurt him. She said she did not love him. She wanted him to leave. Because he did not know her. But he knew that her words lied. Because her eyes spoke the truth, not her tears. Her lips spoke the truth, not her words. Her touch spoke the truth, not her hands. She was close, he got closer. It was his dream, and he was free to make it as real as he hoped it would be. He got even closer. Less than a breath away. He knew that he could kiss her and she would not have pulled away. She would be his, if only in the land of dreams. His skin burned for her. His lips yearned for the feel of hers. If he had not kissed her then, he swore he'd go mad. She moved closer. Just a breath away. He could feel it...

And then all he could feel was Emre tickling his ear with a strand of leaves. Come to think of it, that was not all he felt in that moment. He felt like plowing Emre down for thrusting him back to reality in the worst possible moment. A moment before they kissed...