A LEAP OF THE EARLY BIRD

Realizing where his heart belonged...

The difference between giving up and fighting for victory lies in the heart of a person. To stay and fight or to leave with a head held high to make it appear that leaving did not hurt. The choice is up to the person, and the person alone. They have to decide what really lies at the base of the choice, and whether the end result is based on bravery. Some are brave enough to walk away. Others are brave enough to stay. And both decisions carry with themselves consequences often not yet imagined when that choice is made...

It was strange to think that Can Divit could sit in silence and contemplate his next move. It was so out of his character that even Metin and Akif would not have recognized their friend. Yet that was exactly what he was doing. He sat in silence. Sat and thought. Not only contemplating his next move, but remembering how his life had changed in such a short period of time. Perhaps, that was not the answer. He was remembering WHO caused his life to change. The person who changed his life possessed the most sincere heart he had ever met in his life. Sanem helped him to open up in ways he never thought possible. The more he thought of leaving, the more he could not stand the thought of loosing that feeling of happiness and light his heart felt whenever Sanem was near.

Sitting at the airport parking zone Can thought of his life. Of what it had been, of what it was now, of what it could have been with Sanem, and what it would look like without her in it. The past no longer existed. He bid it farewell the moment he realized how much Sanem mattered to him and when he broke up with Polen. The present existed now and lay in his hands, and it was up to him to decide his next step. And the future? Future existed with Sanem's name painted on his heart, and only hers. Should he leave and forever wonder what could have been? Sould he stay and fight for all that it could be?

He tore up the plane ticket. He was not a man of regret. He would be a fool to become one now. She pushed his buttons. She pushed him beyond limits. And he was crazy about her for that. He would fight for her. For them and their love. He was a man of action. A man of wit. A man of his word. Why on earth did he doubt himself? After all, all had not been lost. She was no longer engaged. She was free to choose. And he would make sure that she would surrender to his love, and would accept his feelings for her. Aftee all, she did search for him and found him deep in the forest. She revealed a glimpse of her feelings and told him not to leave. So he would stay, and fight for her with all that he was. He would just have to figure out what his best plan of action would be...

Lost in his thoughts of what to do next he opened the door to his home, and froze. Sanem was there. And so was Polen. A flash of a thought flew through his mind that maybe staying was not the best choice after all. But no, he erased that thought from his mind and memory. He could not decide whether seeing Sanem come to his home surprised him more or if seeing Polen there did. Needless to say, a man never knew how to act in that moment. He looked at Sanem, but Polen reached out first. His surprise grew even more when he saw how polite Sanem was toward Polen. She began to leave, and Can went after her. He could not let her leave like that. Not like that. He asked why she had come. She babbled again, and he knew she was scared and nervous to admit anything. He damned Polen for showing up just now. If she hadn't come... If she stayed away... Maybe, just maybe, Sanem would have found the courage to reveal her feelings for him. But now he stood still, again, watching the gate close behind Sanem. And the pain of regret burned deep in his soul.

He went back inside and spoke with Polen. She reached for his hands, and he pulled them away quickly. Whatever Polen used to mean to him, those feelings were gone. But he pulled away for another reason. He held Sanem's bandana in his wounded hand. Polen would never understand how much that most precious piece of material meant to him. He would never ever let her touch it. Not now and not ever. He held it close in his hand, and closer to his heart. As they sat and ate, he felt no huger at all. He looked at Polen from accross the table but barely saw her. He listened to her words, but barely heard what she said. His heart was not there anymore. Looking at Polen, realizing where his heart truly belonged, Can finally understood that his heart never really layed with Polen, it never opened up to her. And he now understood the difference between Polen and Sanem.

When the morning came, he could not sit still. He slept under the stars. He ran, and he walked. And he felt Sanem with him every step of the way. When he returned home, Polen was there, pretending nothing ended, pretending she did not care for his words of rejection and their relationship ending. She made a snarly joke, which only rubbed him the wrong way. And he realized Sanem would never permit herself to speak to him in such a way. And he found that it was another difference between Polen and Sanem. In Sanem's favor, once more and again. Polen asked him to reconsider, but he had made up his mind. His heart opened up to Sanem in a way it never could with Polen. He was never after just settling with Polen. And with Sanem, it would never be about settling, but about fighting for that best kind of love.

So Polen tried a different approach. She asked about the other woman, he said there was someone, but they were not involved. And he was honest, with full thrust of pain in his heart. But Polen kept pushing, to the point of insulting his judgement. She called Sanem a whim of his temporary phase. He heard enough. He finally realized what kind of a woman Polen was, and what she thought of him. There was no passion in her, just possessiveness. Just like his mother. And that thought stuck a thorn in his side. Polen would never measure up to Sanem and her love for him. He saw that clearly. He needed to get out. To get out of the house. He needed Sanem, if only in the taste of tea she taught Ceycey how to brew.

He headed to the agency. And his heart flipped sideways to see Sanem sitting there by the breakfast bar. She was back. And so was he. If that was not enought to heal his heart by the slightest bit, he did not know what could. And then she spoke up, and healed his heart even more. Their reminiscent riddle brightened up his mood. So she'd come. So did he. Should she leave? Did she want to? Did he want her to stay? He swore if it wasn't for those around them, he would have pulled her in for the closest of hugs. If only he could. But instead, he offered his smile. He hadn't realized he had already been smiling since the moment he saw her. Such was the magic she held over him. Such was the magic of the love he felt for her. In a matter of moments she brightened up his day. Simply by being next to him. Simply by coming back to his life...