A LEAP OF THE EARLY BIRD

A repeated twist of fate...

Humanity is prone to making mistakes. Some may say that it runs on them. But humanity is also about learning from mistakes and learning to grow from them. Otherwise they come back to be faced again, and unless the lesson is learned, that mistake is bound to be repeated - by choice...

Sanem froze. What began as the most beautiful of mornings shared with her beloved Can ended the moment Aylin showed up with Emre. A ring that symbolized all Sanem's mistakes to her fell out of Aylin's clutch purse. The surge of fear mixed with pain of regret hit her heart even before Can turned to see what it was. Because she heard what fell onto the ground before she saw what it was. The sound of a precious item could not have made that noise. That was the sound of the heaviest of objects she ever held in her hands. The moment he leaned down to pick it up only reassured her about it.

Can picked up the ring. Brought it closer. Closer. Closer, to inspect it. Damned if he was, but that ring was the one that adorned Sanem's finger. Her engagement finger. Neither of his thoughts, the sight of seeing the ring, nor the feel of the ring in his hand made any sense. None of it linked itself in any kind of logical explanation. He was as surprised to see it as he was shocked at the sudden pang to his gut. Was it hurt? Was it fear? Was it both? How on earth was it possible for Sanem's ring to end up in Aylin's possession, only to end up in his hand? The fact that Aylin never made mistakes was clear. That ring fell out of her purse because she planned it that way. But why? That question would wait. It had to. Because the only thing that run through his heart, mind, body, soul, and gut was Sanem, and her part of that story...

He stood up, no longer being able to sit. He saw Sanem's fear. Why fear? Was it fear of what the ring meant? Was it fear because he found out that the ring changed its owner? Or was it fear because he found out? Whatever it was, he would make sure she would explain it all. All. But she kept silent. And he was baffled. For a woman asking him to keep their love hidden from Emre, why was she looking at Emre for answers now? Why at Emre? Why not into his eyes? His? Shouldn't HE matter now? Shouldn't it matter what HE thought now? Felt?

Fully aware of the fact that she was back to that place she vowed never to return, Sanem was stuck. She was lost, with no way out. All of her past came back not only to haunt her but to bring her down. None of the moments they shared would have been able to save her, she was sure of it. Just as she was sure this day and this moment was quickly becoming one that would be the last for them as beloveds. She looked at Emre, Aylin, and finally at Can. He was hurt, scared, and most of all unprepared to see what he was seeing. And that was the most painful part, out of many. Because unprepared Can meant to her that he fell so hard for her that he let his guard down. And the pain she was about to cause him would be of her and only her own doing.

The time had come for her to come clean. She knew it was the end. Felt it in the most painful of ways. She gathered courage. But the moment she was going to speak, Aylin spoke up. And Sanem felt even worse than she did a moment ago. She felt sick to her stomach. Aylin lied. She did not know why Aylin had lied. She did not know that Aylin lied to kill two birds with one stone - not only she created a rift between Sanem and Can, but she threw Emre's and hers engagement right in Can's face. The sight of Can's face was more than Sanem could handle. He was hurt. But worse, he felt betrayed. On both accounts - hers and his own brother's.

She felt that the air in her lungs was not only evaporating, it actually burned her from within. She lied. She was forced to lie. But, she had a choice. She HAD a choice. To tell the truth and see if he really loved her. Or to hide behind the fear of her mistakes and hope for a better day when she would find the right words or the right time to tell everything to Can. And the choice she made hurt her much more than facing the truth might have...

She left the house. No, she fled. Because she knew he knew that she was not alright. Because she babled. And she knew that he knew what that meant. But she could not bring herself to look into his eyes. Because she failed him. She failed herself. She not only made a mistake. In a repeated twist of fate she made it again. And she made it consciously. Fully knowing that she promissed herself she would not lie to him anymore. The simple fact that Aylin lied for her and then came after her to make sure she was alright brough to Sanem a new level of dislike for her. Whatever game they were playing she would not want any part of it. She loved Can and she was not the kind to play games. Not with Can's heart and never with his love. And whatever came next, she would face the consequences. Because they were hers, and they were inevitable...