A LEAP OF THE EARLY BIRD

A yearning heart of lost trust...

How much pain can one endure, much less within 24 hours? Is one excrutiating change manageable? It depends on the change. But two? Three? How many blows can one take before collapsing on the floor?How many blows before one gives up and gives in to the despair that grips at the heart? There are those who collapse at first blow. And then there are those made out of a much stronger fabric. Because they know that the only way out of that pain is to fight through it.

Can felt like his heart was ripped out of his chest the night Sanem admitted to her mistakes. He trusted her. He loved her. But because she broke that trust he had only one option. He took that trust back. The only problem was, he knew he would be hopeless in taking his love back. Because he knew he would not be able to do so. The moment he let Sanem in to his heart, he knowingly gave his it to her. Consciously. Forevermore. Whether he was fully aware of consequences of it at the time or not. The only thing that mattered was the fact that he gave it to Sanem. And there was no way of getting it back. Whether he liked it or not. Whether she was aware of it or not.

Seeing her at the agency felt like his lungs would collapse. The moment he saw her looking straight at him, toward him, for him, felt like an excrutiating weight had befallen on his heart. He had to turn away, walk away. She came to his office, but he could not look at her. Not because he already turned away from her. But because he fought an urge to bring her closer. For a man always in control, he lost it the moment she walked in and requested to talk. He was done listening. Because her voice hurt. He presence exasperated him. Worst of all, the inability to just embrace felt so odd that it simply did not feel right.

A thought came to Can that if he did not see Sanem, it would not feel as bad. He was both wrong and foolish to think so. Not only he still hurt from telling her that after she paid off her dept it would not matter to him what happened to her, he actually hated himself for saying those words to her. He realized that for the first time in his life he became spiteful. And that was something he vowed never to do. Especially to someone that he loved. Because he was not his mother. To top it all of, the moment he saw her walk right into incoming traffic, his heart felt something he did not completely understand himself. He feared for her life. He fought so hard to convince himself he would be strong enough to cut her off from everything that mattered to him. But the truth was SHE was what mattered to him. Even though he tried to reason with himself, to make himself believe that he had to move on, he realized that was just wishful thinking. What's more, holding her in his arms, even if only for a brief second, felt like a little bit of peace returned back to his heart. He held her close to his heart, even if he knew he had to let go. He still loved her, and it surprised him just how much...

But nothing would have prepared him for the surprise of one of the most unpleasant moments in his life. His friend Murat Cerete came to visit the agency. And he was as serious about speaking with Can as he was glad to see his longtime friend. But Can's gut turned in a way that was never a good sign. They returned to the agency and spoke briefly before Murat got to the point. He revealed the prime reason why he came to the agency, personally. To make things worse, Emre came it at just the exact wrong moment. With a confident face, which quickly turned grimmer than grim. Murat accused Fikri Harika of giving out a bribe. To be exact, he accused Can directly. To say that Can was floored by the accussation would have been an understatement of the century. He was not only surprised, he was furious. Trying to remain calm in front of Murat took all of his strength. Murat was not only the head of Cerete Holdings, he was also his longtime friend. To loose trust and honor as a righteous man in the eyes of his friend and prospect business partner was beyond appaling to Can. He swore to his friend he was not the one who bribed Cerete Holdings' director, and vowed to get to the bottom of the matter and find out who would dare to disgrace the agency in such a vile way.

It only took one look at Emre for Can to figure out who the perpetrator was. Emre. His own brother. The son of the owner of the agency. If he wasn't furious at Emre already for taking advantage of Sanem, he was beyond furious now. He was sick to his stomach. But he was not speechless. No, not by any means. Whatever temper still simmered in him from the night before, he let it loose now. Full force. Full fury. It was beyond his comprehension how one could be so vile to hate his own father to such an extent. It was beyond him how one could be so blinded by his own personal gains to stoop so low as to offer a bribe.

The temper that ran through him was gaining strength. Something he never though he would feel toward his brother. There weren't many things he tolerated less than greed and personal gains. It twisted his stomach to look into his brother's eyes and see just that. And Emre neither denied it nor tried to cover it up. He proudly announced it that he did it for the company's good. Worse, he tried to twist the facts and wanted to put the blame on Can, pointing out that Can came in to the office and acted like a boss and spent money left and right. That only added fuel to the fire burning in Can. He told Emre, stoic and confident and with ice cold words, looking him straight in his eyes, that he was not going anywhere. He was here until Aziz returned. Whether Emre liked it or not. He would not see his father's work of life and passion go down the drain because of Emre's despicable and wretched actions.

What Emre said caused Can to explode from within. Emre suggested they call upon their mother for help. For her money. Can almost lost all sense of restrain he still had in him. Not her. Never her. Not now, and not ever. He told Emre to leave, as calmly as he could. Sitting alone in his office, he could barely wrap his head around what was happening. First Sanem, then Emre. Control of his life as he knew it was slipping through his fingers. After leaving his office, he returned to see Sanem reaching for his moonstone that fell on the ground. And he hadn't even noticed it fell. That image of Sanem reaching for his moonstone hit his heart with a familiar pang. She hurt him, but she still cared. And even though his yearning heart of lost trust hurt beyond words, it still beat for her, only her...