Birds of a Feather (Oswald Cobblepot)

Momma's Boy

I listen from my apartment room as Oswald greets his mother downstairs. I take out a broom to start sweeping the floor. At least he has one other person he can trust, who'll be there to comfort him in times of need. Because, there's no way I could handle him on my own.

"Ah! ...so beautiful," Mrs. Cobblepot coos from downstairs.

I smile, he must have just given her the brooch.

"As soon as I saw it, I thought of you," Oswald's tone is soft and light.

I can't help but scoff, even if he loves his mother, he certainly isn't above lying to her.

"Such a good son," she praises.

I roll my eyes, I can't believe she's buying his game. Then again, I can't help but be a tad bit jealous. Not that I would want an overprotective mother...but, it's not as if I know what it's like to have one.

"Put it on, put it on," he encourages like a small child.

Suddenly, Mrs. Cobblepot gasps, "Oh...what happened? Who did this?"

She must have noticed Oswald's bandaged hand. I smirk, how's Oswald going to talk his way out of this one?

"N-Nobody. It's just a scratch."

"Is your mother a fool? No. Someone...is being mean to my boy-"

"Hey," he interrupts, placing his hand on hers, "it's a tough business."

Well, at least she's picking up on that. But, it isn't so much that these people are trying to be "mean" as they're going after his head.

"The restaurant business, so tough these days. Why is that?" she bemoans.

"My success makes other people envious," Oswald boasts, although his tone remains humble as ever.

"So tell the boss on these people."

A laugh escapes me. That response doesn't even work in school, why would it work in a criminal organization?

"This person isn't scared of the boss. Not like they should be. ...I don't know why," he grumbles.

"I know," Mrs. Cobblepot begins, "when I was in school, Magda Himmelfarb was so mean to me...and teacher did nothing!"

Well duh.

"Why?" Oswald asks, although I'm certain he already knows the answer.

"Because such a good dancer I was, and Magda, with her nice hair and her big bosom, a carthorse!" she cries.

I could imagine Oswald shaking his head before responding, "I meant...why did the teacher do nothing?"

"Why you think? 'Private lessons' they said. I put stop to that," she hisses mischievously.

He scoffs, somewhat surprised, "You told on them?"

"Oh no, I denounced Magda's father, to secret police."

Hmph, sounds like something that she would do, considering she tied me up and tried to kill me. Although...it makes me curious as to Mrs. Cobblepot's past. It sounds like an Eastern European soap opera, if such thing exists.

There's a snapping sound from downstairs in the Cobblepots' apartment, "Ah! Three weeks, he's been turning up his nose at my traps, and now, now today, a smidge of camembert and Mr. Rat, he can not resist. No, oh, can you? Can you my little greedy baby? I found out your secret!"

Hmm, the Cobblepots are having a rat problem? It hasn't reached me, at least not that I know of, but hopefully the rat isn't Mr. Sniffles.

"Yes," Oswald mumbles in revelation, "...everyone has a secret."