Birds of a Feather (Oswald Cobblepot)

Mythic Beginnings

   The Trickster and I roll up to a pristine mansion on the outskirts of Central City in a white news van he'd stolen a couple of blocks away. We're both dressed in sharp business suits, and the Trickster already has his facial disguise as well as a black toupee on.

"Alright, so first, we have to kidnap the real mayor. To make sure he doesn't get in the way," the Trickster explains, "say babe, how do I look?"

I smile, leaning over to his side. I touch his face, feeling for the slight curve in his skin. With it, I slowly peel off the mask, revealing his real face.

"Now? I think you look rather dashing."

His breathing quickens, before he leans in and starts to sloppily kiss me on the lips. This is beyond disgusting, but I know if I let go too soon, he'll realize something's amiss.

I let go after a couple of seconds, not knowing how much longer he would've kept on going if I'd let him. I hand him back his mask.

"Oh, my dear. When we finish pulling off my latest plot, you and I are going to enjoy a passionate, eager honeymoon," he growls, pulling the keys out of van and yanking off his seatbelt.

I continue to smile, but I'm also sick to my stomach. At least now I know my exit cue.

We climb to the back of the van, where the Trickster arms himself with various weapons and tools. While he isn’t looking, I pull a small black duffel bag out from under a pile of toys. Inside the duffel bag are my daggers, marbles, and utility belt. Strapping my utility belt to my pants, and securing my knives and marbles onto my legs, I follow the Trickster out of the van. He’s holding a professional TV camera, the large piece of equipment obscuring his face. He hands me a dummy microphone, the large fake speaker and handle made of styrofoam.

We walk up the paved path to the white mansion. I ring the doorbell, and a man with black hair and a mustache answers the door in his bathrobe.

“You’re, you’re here already? I thought the interviewers weren’t suppose to show up for a couple of hours-”

“Say cheese, Hill!” the Trickster cries, before aiming the camera directly at him.

A bright flash hits Mayor Hill, and I receive some of the light too, blinding me in an instant. There’s a thud, as the mayor presumably hits the floor. I lean against the doorway as the Trickster passes me, his legs brushing by me.

"Did I get you too, sweetheart? Sorry, but these things happen," the Trickster apologizes as he hoists up he Trickster apologizes as he begins to drag the mayor’s body along the hardwood floor.

I rub my eyes, only just beginning to recover from the stun when the sound of footsteps echo across the room. By the time I finally regain my vision and look up, the Trickster has Mayor Hill tied up.

“He will wake soon. We must have committed the deed by then. Till then, no one must see him. Help me carry him,” the Trickster commands, keeping his tone hushed.

We carry the mayor down a flight of stairs to the basement, and afterwards quickly escape out the backdoor.

“I can’t believe Mayor Hill doesn’t have any security,” I comment as we get back into the van.

The Trickster chuckles, “People in Central City are trusting, my dear, this isn’t Gotham, you know,” he laughs to himself as he starts up the van, “although, I’ve always wanted to visit that place. Scalawags, thieves, mobsters, crooks, vandals, cutpurses! My kind of people, you know?”

I smile sarcastically, “You’d fit right in, James.”

We roll up next to the Central City Museum. The Trickster adjusts his mask before stepping out of the van, "Remember, you're my lovely assistant. Just smile and I'll do all the talking."