The Girl At The Last

Chapter 38

Elaine

"These are pictures"

"I can see that"

"Why are these just pictures?"I scroll down, overwhelming emotions clouding me as I clicked on each one. They were so many of them. From their wedding to my fisrt day of kindergarten. It was like a portfolio which revived so many dead memories. As much as I was carried away by the hurricane of retired time and afflicted bliss. My heart was still disappointed over the fact that I was back to square one. With no clue or hint to lead a way.

"Were they suppose to be something else?" Nathan said as he patiently sat beside me on the rug, our back leaning against the foot of our bed. We've been like this from the past fifteen minutes or so and yet we're not half way done through the media the drive had garnered for years.

When I nodded unconsciously biting on my finger nails, he softly grabbed my wrist with a warning look when I looked at him.

"Like what?"he asked when I zoomed in a portrait of my Mother's opera performance. Her lips curled Into a graceful smile as her features were accentuated by the stage light, no word could justify the beauty she was.

"I don't know. Something that could lead me closer or give me a gist of my parents past lives" internally groaning with the caged sense of helplessness and infuriating forlorn I closed my eyes, very well aware of how much vulnerable I was in front of him now.

"Is that even necessary? You had known them for eleven years. what could you possibly not know about them." His voice held a thread of confusion with intrusiveness.

"That's the problem, I think I know them but there's this itch which had always been in my head after they died." I cast him a glace through my lashes as my fist curls up with a strong desire to punch something. Funny how a dead end and breaking point of distress could cause a person to unreveal the secrets and prospects they had been keeping from people their whole lives. For me it was tonight. I could feel the patience curdling in me.

"Itch like?"

"Like there's a missing puzzle or lost frontier about them which led to their death"

"What do you mean by that?"

"My parent's, their imprint that they ever existed vanished along with them passing away." gesturing my hands in air, I tried to make him understand. There was no way I could make him perceive my situation or what I am upto and be discreet about it equally.

"How do you know that?" His lips puckered on corner as if he was strained he asks, but I could also feel the concern in his warm brown eyes as he watches me intently, watches me loose my shit.

"I learned to snoop around on people's private lives from you for a reason" I looked away from him feeling the shame hiking up over my past actions. I know I did some mistakes in past, but one being judging Nathan for his gullible persona to be overbearing. Now that I know him, I wish we could've been friends earlier than we gave ourselves a chance.

"You saw my medical files when you sorted out your Mother's cabinet didn't you?"he nods mechanically as I continued when I felt him wait for me to catch up on my breath as I realized I had spaced out. He said nothing but neither was his demeanour judgemental or accusatory.

"I believe in those nasty depressing pages somewhere in between my parents death must've been mentioned" he stiffened at my words, his mouth opening to say something but I cut him off.

"What were they?"

"Accident" his answer came few hesitant second later. But tonight if I am going to tell him everything, It's me who needs to be strong.