Never Let Me Go (Renesmee & Jacob Twilight Fanfiction) 2020

Twenty Nine - Love insomnia

She laid in bed later that evening replaying events in her head.

She was in Jacob's bed. He had decided, for the first time in their lives, to sleep in separate beds, so was sleeping in the lounge. Before this evening she might have argued with him, but she was thankful for him suggesting it as she didn't know how she would have got a wink of sleep otherwise.

She'd changed into her short PJ's, to keep her cool. She was still trying to come down from the excitement of earlier.

Once they'd dived back in, a more thorough exploration had commenced from both sides.

They swam around each other playfully and gracefully.

He became much more involved this time, running his hands over her body. She repeated a similar exploration, however spent most of the time with her hands sweeping up and down his smooth back, as she became distracted by his progress.

His hand was resting gently near the top of her arm, his lips however, were making their way down from her neck towards it.

Her heart was hammering.

As he reached her shoulder, he brushed the strap from her top off her shoulder so it was made bare for him to continue. As he kissed and caressed her bare shoulder her head swam, it was her this time who let out an involuntary gasp. She got her breath under control better than Jacob had, but she knew she would need to surface soon. He looked up at her concerned, this did not help her to concentrate on holding her breath tight. Noticing her struggle for air, he pulled her towards him and held her tight, kicking his way to the surface gently. She noticed his hand was placed in the small of her back again, this time pushing her body against his. She knew this sensation better than the others she'd experienced tonight, she was in a Jacob cocoon. It was perfect bliss, even though her lungs burned uncomfortably, she could happily never reach the surface.

All too soon they were back out into the cold air. Renesmee coughed and spluttered only slightly as she took in her breath. Jacob still had a tight hold of her. She was on dangerous ground now.

Clear to enforce the point, what happened down there should remain unspoken, she very casually and cheerfully said to him, "Well I promised your Dad I'd only borrow you for a couple of hours, so I best return you."

As she looked at him she couldn't help the massive smile which spread across her face, her heart frantically beating. He returned an equally huge smile back at her.

"Yea, it's probably best to head back, otherwise he'll think you've led me astray again," he said, winking at his last remark, making her stomach do a somersault.

They swam back to the shore. Once out of the water, their warm bodies quickly started evaporating the water from their clothes. Jacob made a point of keeping the conversation as normal as possible, clearly understanding her request to not speak of what had just happened, although sometimes he kept the conversation a little too normal.

"Lovely weather this evening, don't you think?" he said with a cheeky grin. She chuckled.

By the time they were back at Jacob's house, an onlooker wouldn't have been able to tell anything different had just taken place, accept that they both seemed uncontrollably happy.

She now lay warm and cosy in Jacob's bed, breathing in his intoxicating scent from his pillow, her heart trying to calm itself.

So she was in love with Jacob Black. She smiled at the thought. It made perfect sense to her. He'd been there for her, unwaveringly, from the day she was born. He'd taken care of her, made her laugh, entertained her, protected and loved her. It was hard to see how she could possibly fall in love with anyone else. He was everything to her, she'd loved him for as long as she could remember and her love had now matured further than she could have imagined.

Growing up, he'd been like the best older brother ever, but her thoughts of him now were as far from brotherly than she could imagine. Did everyone else still see them as Brother and Sister? What would her family think when they inevitably found out? Would they be angry she'd fallen for their friend? Would they disapprove of her falling for a slightly older Man? Older in years only, as they both now looked the same age.

She'd still not allowed herself to consider Jacob's feelings. She occasionally found herself thinking that he must like her a bit, he's not that good an actor, he definitely felt something under the ocean. She'd nearly kissed him, she smiled to herself at the memory, wishing she had managed to. He hadn't tried to pull away, in fact it had taken his breath away so much that he had to resurface. But was it purely physical? Did he think they were having a bit of harmless fun? She'd given no real indication otherwise, so that could be a real possibility. She told herself off for even considering the subject for this amount of time. Even if he declared his love for her (she felt giddy at the thought), she wasn't sure of what she would do. 

If he imprinted on someone, then he would feel really guilty but not be able to do anything about it. She knew she would get hurt either way, but would it be worse if she'd had a taste of what she'd be losing? She imagined it would be. If she told him how she felt and he didn't feel the same way then that could ruin their friendship or make things very uncomfortable, she didn't want that.

She was perfectly content at the moment, she'd be able to love him at a distance through their friendship. She knew she'd be fine, she'd just treat him like normal, but find subtle ways to show him how much he means to her.

It was now four in the morning and she needed some rest. She cleared her head of cluttering thoughts and submerged her mind back beneath the ocean. Breathing in the scent from Jacob's pillow, she fell into a beautiful sleep.