Never Let Me Go (Renesmee & Jacob Twilight Fanfiction) 2020

Thirty One - 'The chat'

Ethan opened his door and smiled massively at her.

"Hiya so this is a nice surprise," he said. The guilt she was already feeling twisted itself in her stomach. 

She smiled politely back and simply said, "Hey."

She had arranged to meet him at his dorm room on campus. She was impressed with the College, having never been there before. It was less than a twenty minute drive from forks, twenty minutes for her, forty for anyone else. 

She focused on the less than pleasant reason for being there. She knew they hadn't been seeing each other for very long, only actually having two dates. Still she felt really bad and nervous, she'd never had to do anything like this before. She got to know him well over the last few times and knew he deserved respect from her. There was no way she could just tell him in a text or something.

He invited her inside, leaned in and gave her a quick kiss on the lips, which she didn't have any time to avoid. Upon seeing her serious face his chipper mood seemed to vanish. He grabbed a glass of water each for them, then they sat on the sofa. 

She spoke first, "I'm really sorry but I need to talk to you."

"I've got a feeling I'm not going to like this," he responded. 

She gave him a slight sympathetic smile, then proceed to explain to him as nicely and as best as she could how she was feeling. About how she loved his company and it was because of that, that she got confused and thought she wanted more. She explained that she'd recently realised she wasn't feeling the same way he was. Then wanting to be completely honest with him, so he'd understand, she told him that she had developed feelings for someone. That she hadn't realised how she felt until now and even though she didn't see anything happening with the person, it wasn't fair to mess him about or use him when she knew she could never feel the same way about him.

"I wouldn't mind if you used me a little bit," he had replied cheekily.

"I would!" she said shocked by his response, "I respect you too much to use you," she said matter of factly. "I'm sorry if it already feels like I have, I honestly never set out to. I just didn't realise my true feelings," she said sincerely. He looked down trodden and replied,

"It's Jacob isn't it?" Her stomach made a jolt at his name. She paused for a second then looked at him with an awkward smile.

"How did you guess?" she asked.

"Sort of obvious really. The way you two are with each other. Even though I've only seen you two together twice, it was easy to spot how deep the connection was. The way you spoke about him as well, I had hoped it was just a really big brotherly type connection, but alas it was not," Ethan said calmly.

"I'm really sorry," Renesmee repeated solemnly. To her surprise he managed a small smile in response.

"You really don't need to be, I'm not stupid. I had figured out a little while ago that I was more into you than you were in me. I had just vainly hoped that I could win you over in time.

First time I met Jacob I knew he'd be my competition. I should have disliked him then and even more so now, but he seems like a good guy so it's hard to," he said honestly.

"That's funny, he said the same thing about you."

"Well he can't help it if he's a fantastic judge of character."

"You are taking this better than I thought."

"I'm not about to lie to you and say I'm completely fine with it, I wouldn't expect you to believe me if I did. I feel that we understand each other pretty well and can be ourselves. So I'm grateful for you telling me like this and for not leading me on, although like I said, I don't think I'd have mattered the latter a bit," he said smiling at her, "You are still the most beautiful person I've ever met."