Our Little Forever ➳ Camila Cabello

forty-nine

I made one deep cut into my wrist and singed at the harsh slice.

As I was about to do another one, someone walked into the bathroom.

"Y/N?" The familiar voice said, walking up closer to the stall. I heard a soft knock, "Baby girl, are you okay?"

"I'm f-fine, Ma." I lied after sniffling and grabbing my wallet to slip the razor back into place and grabbing some toilet paper to dab off my heavily bleeding arm before rolling my sleeve down.

I brushed my fingers through my hair before walking out out the stall to see a worried Ally that stood many inches shorter than me.

I could see the emotions running throughout her but I decided to pretend like I didn't notice it and went to the sink to wash my hands.

Ally put her hand on my shoulder and spoke softly, "Are you sure you're okay?"

I looked at her in the mirror to see how emotional she was through the reflection. I felt the need to be rude but with this stutter, the dramatics will seem childish. I nodded in response as I walked over to the hand dryer.

Ally held her hand out and I took it so she could guide me back out to the table.

--

After an hour of eating, I started to feel a little disoriented. I'm not sure why though.

"Are you going back to the bus after this?" Camila asked after biting off a piece of her carrot stick.

I nodded and looked around the restaurant to see my vision was blurring but I didn't want to worry the girls. I waved over Scooter and when I did that, I noticed my sleeve was soaked in nothing but my own blood.

I started to silently panic and I got up to almost fall down but Scooter caught me.

"Baby are you okay?" Camila asked.

Scooter held me up as I nodded and kept my arm clutched to the side so the girls wouldn't see, "I n-need to t-take a na-ap." I tip toed with what little energy I had to whisper to Scooter, "Take me to the h-hospital."

His eyes widened as he pulled me to the back of the restaurant and brought out his phone, "What did you
do?" The person on the phone answered and he began to speak through the receiver, "Bring the car around the back. Y/N is hurt."

He sat me down on a chair by the back door and his eyes glared down to my blood covered sleeve.

He knelt down in front of me and rolled up my sleeve to see the deep slit across my wrist that was seeping blood.

"When did you do this?" Scooter yanked my sweater off of me so he could rip off a piece of fabric and tie it around my wrist tightly.

"A little while ago." I yawned, feeling myself get extremely sleepy.

He looked outside and I couldn't turn my head to see what he was looking at. Before I knew it, Scooter cradled me and ran me out to the van.

I could hear someone call out behind us. Someone I knew very well.

"Scooter! Where are you going?!" They exclaimed.

I looked up at him with pleading eyes even though they were starting to close.

"We'll be back." Scooter insisted, hurrying into the back of the vehicle and sliding me in the seat.

I could feel myself lose my grip of reality with each passing second. My head got lighter and my eyes got heavy.

I felt a soft repetitive smack on my face and Scooters soft voice urged me, "Y/N, you have to stay awake. Okay? Just until we get to the hospital."

I took a sharp breath and forced my eyes open as much as I could, "H-how long?"

"Give us five more minutes. Please." Scooter begged me.

I tensed up all over and felt another wave of pain from the withdrawals start to fill me up. My shakiness got to the point where my vision was completely blurred and I was barely able to see anything through my tears. My strength was failing fast and my heart was about to pump out of my chest.

Scooter wrapped his arm around me tightly and pulled me into an embrace as my eyes slowly closed no matter how much I tried to keep them open.

There was no use.

I was so tired that I just needed to take a nap.

I just needed to rest.

Soon there was nothing but darkness and I couldn't hear anything or anyone. The outside world was gone and the pitched blackness took over.

I looked around but couldn't find anything. I couldn't move. There was nothing. What scared me most was the fear within the darkness.

Everything in my mind was so clear.

Camila. Where is she? Could she be here? Where do I find her?

Only moments later, I woke up again to a bright white light. I fluttered my eyelashes to see everything come back to me slowly.

My vision cleared a little and I saw Scooter sitting on the side of the bed just looking at me.

I trailed my eyes everywhere and saw myself hooked up to an IV with clear liquid pouring into a tube and some patches on my chest that were connected to a machine.

My energy was slowly regaining.

I took a deep breath and grogged out, "What's the status, Scoot?"

Scooter hung his head and mess with his hands before brushing one through his hair and looking back up at me, "The doctor said you're lucky to be alive."

"What else?" I could tell there was something more.

Scooter pushed out his bottom lip and shook his head, "Nothing. That's all she said before she left."

"Well, can I leave before Camila and the other girls get word of this?" I asked nicely before pulling up my throbbing arm to scan over it.

Another set of black stitches lined over the injured skin to close up the wound. Minuscule amounts of dried blood covered the cut but it was very noticeable that I had cut.

Scooter nodded and got up from his seat, "I'll go find the doctor."

I could tell he was disappointed. Maybe it was because he didn't know anything about this whole self harming charade. Or maybe it's because he felt helpless to the moment.

I held up my arm to press my index finger onto the stitches softly. The stinging bruised skin around it only made me hurt worse. The roughness of the surgical thread made me cringe.

In the middle of my own examination of the wound, the Doctor came in with Scooter trailing behind her slowly.

She flipped open the metal clip board and scribbled down on the pad with a pen. After ripping off the page, she handed it to me so I could look over it.

It was a prescription for pain meds. Guess what kind? Percocets.

"You'll need that for the pain in your arm although with the amount of self inflicted wounds we've seen on you, you'll probably be used to pain." She pursed her lips at me and closed the clipboard, "And don't worry. Scooter has wanted nothing but utter discreetness which we will provide."

"Thank you." I said in a hoarse voice.

She sent me a slight nod before turning on her heel and walking away which automatically sent in a tall nurse to take out my IV and other medical indiscretions.

Scoot helped me out of the bed and put his arm around my waist.