Chapter 19: Mateo

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"Fucker!" Skinner yelled again. I was still taking deep breaths to calm myself down. When he started... to Grace everyone held their breath watching, Taylor walked away crying. I know that if I started yelling, I would lose my shit. Nate was beside me trembling and I knew he was crying, it was hard to watch, Jason tried pushing us out but we couldn't leave.

I threw my hands up walking away from the computer and I threw open the front door. I didn't stop walking until I was in the middle of our front yard. I gritted my teeth running my fingers through my hair I started pacing liking the cold temp helping me cool down. It felt like my heart was about to bust, like I was about to go on a killing spree.

"Mateo?" I turned around I saw Nate standing there crying, it made me break down I ran to him and hugged him. I felt him shake in my arms and he slowly wrapped his arms around me. "She's not going to make it." He whimpered.

"She will she has too." I spoke, he pulled away going into the house. I followed behind him and we stood behind Lopez watching as JJ settled in behind her getting ready to sleep.

"At least he got there before it got bad." Lopez muttered.

"What happens the next time Blake distracts him?" Nate asked. I grabbed his shoulders and made him face me.

"Don't worry about that, we keep focusing on things that could happen we'll never stop worry or falling apart." I warned and he nodded, I drug him up to our room again.

"We need to sleep, rest something. We need to take our mind off of this." I said and there was a knock on the door.

"Guys please." I heard Taylor sob and I walked to the door, she fell into my arms. "Listen, you two are the closest people I have to her besides her child. I'd rather not bawl my eyes out in his room so is there any way we can sleep in the same room please?" She looked up at me sobbing. Nate got off the bed and nodded at me.

"Of course." I spoke and led her into the room. Nate made us a cot on the floor, we changed the bedsheets earlier so we gave her the bed.

"Not that there will be much sleeping." She sighed laying down on the bed. I crawled laying on the blankets Nate laid down and Nate crawled in beside me. "I know I've been joking a lot but I can't, I just can't. I can't think of her not being here, I can't think of her being in the hands of someone like him." She sobbed out, curling into a ball. I rose up as did Nate and we watched her; I don't know what to do. Nate sat on the edge of the bed and put a hand on her shoulder and she looked up at him.

"We know how tough she is. She was showing him absolutely no fear and we both know she was riddled with it; she is handling this head on. She would want us to do the same." Nate spoke. Taylor sat up and put her arms around his shoulders.

"I feel like I'm missing a piece of me. We spent our high school years stuck together; I don't like this. You two, you two... you care, you genuinely care and I will be the first to admit when this started, I thought I was going to have to shoot some heads." She smiled and we laughed slightly.

"I promised her I would protect her and I didn't. How am I supposed to be ok with that?" She asked as more tears fell down her face.

"You did the best you could do at the time; no one knew this was coming. None of us did and you know Grace wouldn't blame you right?" I asked her. She looked at me and nodded wiping the tears away.

"I know but I still feel like I should've done something. Now she is in a steel room god knows where and we can't find her." She sighed she let go of Nate turning sit beside him.

"You couldn't have known to do anything. We believe that and she believes that." Nate chimed in.

"We need to rest something my brain feels like its in overdrive and my parents are showing up tomorrow. Yay me." She said laughing and Nate sat back down beside me.

"Your parents?" Nate asked.

"Yeah, they kept insisting I see them and I couldn't make anymore excuses. I told them she was taken and the next thing I know they booked a flight. They are staying in the apartment. You know we could switch if you want, I didn't mean to take this cloud of a bed." She sighed and Nate laughed.

"Shut up, it's yours." He said and I laid down. "For tonight." He finished and she laughed. He laid down beside me and we were facing each other. I know most people would probably be scolding them for laughing and such but if we didn't this would ruin us before she got back and we wouldn't have that.

"She'll be okay." I whispered and Nate nodded.

We just sat there staring into each other's eyes and it was like we were talking without talking. I was staring into his green eyes reading every emotion, anger for being helpless, fear for Grace, hatred for the man who took her, comfort in knowing we have each other, determination that we would get her back, and there would be nothing stopping us from getting her back. I pulled my hand up resting it beside my head on the pillow and Nate put his hand on top of mine. I closed my eyes finding comfort in him being here. 

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