TO: Sticks the Badger and Dave the Intern
FROM: GlitchytheHedgehog
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DARE
I dare Sticks the Badger and Dave the Intern to both reenact that scene in Zootopia where Judy Hopps corners Nick Wilde about the Emmitt Otterten case. Sticks as Nick, and Dave as Judy Hopps.
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CHALLENGE ACCEPTED
Dave: (walks up to Sticks) Hi! Hello! It's me again.
Sticks: Hey, it's Officer Idiot!
Dave: Ha-ha-ho... No. Actually, it's Officer Dave and I'm here to ask you some questions about a case.
Sticks: What happened, Squidward? Did someone steal your clarinet? It wasn't me. (annoyed, Dave blocks the sidewalk, blaring his siren) Hey, loser, you're gonna wake Buster. I gotta get to work.
Dave: (hops out of the car with the file and a pen) This is important, ma'am. I think your ten dollars worth of crazy advice can wait.
Sticks: Ha! I make two hundred bucks a day, dummy. Three hundred and sixty-five days a year since I was twelve. And time is money. Run along.
Dave: Please, just look at the picture. (shows a close-up picture of Knuckles) You gave Mr. Echidna some advice, right? Do you know him?
Sticks: I know everybody. (smirks) And I also know that somewhere, there's a Krusty Krab missing its grouchy employee. So why don't you get back to your box?
Dave: (his smile drops, then becomes serious) Fine. Then we'll have to do this the hard way.
[In a quick second, there is handcuffs attached to Sticks.]
Sticks: Did you just handcuffed me?
Dave: Sticks the Badger, you are under arrest!
Sticks: (scoffs, amused) For what? (mockingly) Hurting your feewings?
Dave: (smiles slyly) Felony tax evasion. (Sticks' smile drops, flabbergasted, and her eyes widen as Dave writes) Yeeaah... two hundred dollars a day, three hundred and sixty-five days a year since you were twelve, that's two decades, so times twenty which is... one million four hundred sixty thousand - I think. I mean, (chuckles) I'm just a dumb intern, but we are good at multiplying. Anyway, according to your tax forms, you reported, let me see here, zero! (Sticks' face freezes in fear) Unfortunately, lying on a federal form is a punishable offense. Five years jail time.
Sticks: Well, it's my word against yours.
[Dave pulls out a tape recorder and plays back Sticks' confession]
Sticks' voice: (through tape recorder) ...two hundred bucks a day, dummy. Three hundred and sixty-five days a year since I was twelve.
Dave: Actually, it's your word against yours. And if you want this recorder, you're going to help me find this poor missing echidna, or the only place you'll giving advice in is prison. (grins) It's called a hustle, sweetheart. (Sticks shows a stunned look)
[Sticks pulls out her boomerang and is about to attack Dave, but Knuckles restrains her.]
Knuckles: Now, now! Calm down, Sticks!
Amy: Let's just move on!
Sonic and Tails: Agreed!
YOU ARE READING
Sonic the Hedgehog - Questions & Answers (Part Deux)
RandomDate of Creation: October 27, 2020 This is part two of my Sonic Q&A book. This book is fan-made and not affiliated with SEGA. WARNING: Some of the pages contains mild language. SONIC THE HEDGEHOG characters © SEGA, SEGA, the SEGA logo and Sonic The...
