Stupid

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"Hey." Suri wasn't sure if she was dreaming or if this was a prank. Is she going let him inside the house? Is she going to listen to him? Is she going to forgive him? Who even told him that she was here? And it was like Jeno was able to read her mind, or maybe he just knows her too well. Of course not, he thought that she cheated on him. "Chan- He told me that you're here. Can we talk? I don't know- I just, I don't deserve your time actually I just want to say something and then I'll leave, I'm going to make it as quick as I can. I promise." 

Suri was still frozen in her place. Jeno wasn't blaming her, he was only blaming himself. He hurt her, He didn't trust her or believe her. He was expecting her to slap him or maybe even slam the door in his face, but she moved aside to let him inside, still silent with her head down. Jeno entered the house and gave Hyunjin a small sad smile. 

Hyunjin. The guy was just standing there, not really sure if he should stay with Suri or leave them to talk privately. He wasn't sure if letting Jeno inside the house was a good idea. What if they got back together? He wasn't really sure if he was okay with that, all he knows that if it made Suri happy, then he's happy. 

"I'm going to be in your room, if you need anything just call me." Hyunjin gave Suri a pat on the shoulder and a small smile, leaving the room without listening to anything. He wasn't planning to stay and listen. Him staying wasn't going to change anything anyways, it was all up to Suri.

"I'm the worst boyfriend ever." Jeno started with a sad chuckle. He copied Suri and sat down on the couch beside her, but he wasn't looking at her. Both of them weren't looking at each other. "I don't deserve you, I didn't trust you, I know that whatever I'm going to say is not an excuse, but I was scared. The idea of losing you itself scared me. Suri, I never understood why you were with someone like me. I always thought that you'd be with someone better than me, you deserve to be with someone better than me. So the idea of you finding someone else, after I was able to get you killed me, because I used to- No, I still sleep every freaking day knowing that someday you're going to leave me to be with someone who's better than me and in the end you weren't the one who left, it was me. I knew that you didn't cheat since day one, I was just too scared to admit it, knowing that people wanted you to be with someone else and not me. I want you back, even though I know that its impossible, but I want you to forgive me, I was stupid for not trusting you. I just want you back in my life." 

"W-What made you come here?" Suri talked for the first time since Jeno came, and he was surprised that she even said anything. Although Jeno wanted to be completely honest with her, he still promised him not to say anything. 

"Mi- I was to wait for you to come back from Chicago, but Chan told that you're already here." 

"Why didn't you answer my calls? Messages?-" Jeno wasn't sure why he ignored her. He was more than sure that Suri loved him, but his insecurities controlled him, and he knows that if it wasn't for Minho talking to him, he would've been still ignoring Suri. "Jeno, you made me feel as if I really did cheat on you. You completely ignored me. People sent me a lot hate because of the whole situation and you weren't even here for me. You disappeared completely. You didn't even stick up for me, you made people think that I did cheat on you.  You made them hate me, you made me feel as if you hated me too. You-" 

"I know, Suri. I know." Jeno now was facing Suri on the couch, but she was still sitting in the same position, not really ready to look at Jeno. "I ruined everything, the rumors wasn't what ruined our relationship, it was me. I lost you, I hurt you, I wasn't a good boyfriend, friend or even a person. I'm too selfish, I only thought about myself and I didn't think about you. I know that millions of sorrys is not going to fix anything, But I'm sorry. I'm the worst." 

Suri didn't turn to look at Jeno, knowing that he was crying by now after she noticed his voice becoming unsteady, then quavering a bit, Suri never saw him cry before and as much as it hurt her, she still thought that he deserved this. Jeno moved his hand closer to Suri's face wiping the tears she didn't know were falling. "I'm really sorry." 

"Lets start from the very beginning again, Okay? Please." Jeno still had his hand on her face, not planning to pull away. "We can start as friends again. Give me one last chance, Suri. Please." 

"One last chance, Jeno. The last." 

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