this was made from boredom so, this is just a random thing.. I won't be posting too much. sorry bout that, maybe I will if I can. anyways stay safe and take care of yourself!
- (means like not posts like the one with ">")
> (means like one shots...
Fun fact: I was just having my mental breakdown/panic attack and I went "holy shit what if I turn this into an angst idea" and boom,, weird ass coping machine
I'm pretty sure this will be just ignored but eh
Also yes this is short cause my motivation sucks 🎉🎉
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Balloon was walking through the forest with an umbrella on his hand, holding tightly to it as it didn't belonged to him, OJ gave it to him, there's no way he can just let this umbrella break or else OJ won trust him to touch his stuff ever again!
Since it was raining, balloon was stepping in small puddles in the ground, in ever step it made a splash sound, the umbrella making noise as the raindrops fall from the umbrella and fall off the umbrella again. Balloon was silently listening to the rain, but it's not because it's the only thing he hears. It's feels like hearing someone cries, someone begging for help, crying and crying until their presence is like a weather problem, balloon heard the cries. But it's not just that, he found comfort in it, it's weird but trust me, when you get numb to your own shaking weak voice, one day you just decided to shut your mouth at once, you don't want to make it worse.
But at the same time, balloon couldn't help but to lose control of his own mouth, the movement of his own mouth irritating people. The reminder of his own existence, something he wished to be shut at the first place. Maybe if he only didn't acted like that in the past, being mean and selfish, what a cruel and bad person he is.
Balloon looked down at the big puddle Infront of him, looking at his reflection, but balloon couldn't help but to realize he is looking at a failure.
Balloon failed as a leader, balloon failed as a friend, balloon failed as a second choice, balloon failed to be good. Balloon failed at everything, he just can't find anything that he's good at.
But, he is kinda good at poetry, probably because none in this island knows poetry. That means no one will appreciate his hard work, his own hard work to try glue words together to create a poem.
No matter how much thoughts he drowned, all he could is to float above it, not like it's gonna help anything. It's just the fact he's floating at the problems, trying to make it look like he's not drowning to the outside. He's still stuck at his own problems, when he does try to fix it, it only gets worse. What's the point of fixing it when it only gets worse?
Balloon had tried so much, so many tries, just to please other people. But this wasnt probably a good idea.
Balloon stared at his reflection, some raindrops splashing at the puddle. Balloon stared at his own eyes, staring and thinking 'How can I continue this?' balloon clenched his fist and looked at he other way instead of looking at the puddle, balloon walked to the other way.
Balloon looked around seeing the trees that surrounds him, it's funny of how trees are there more than people when you are at your lowest.
Balloon saw a big rock, he walked next to the big rock and sat at it. Balloon looked at the big rock he was sitting at, just to see some molds on it. That didn't disgusted balloon, balloon only brushed the mold and stared at it. Molds are a good example of depression, once you don't know how to handle everything, it can either get bigger or spread.
Balloon saw a family of rabbits running to the rabbit hole, all of them one by one, no one was going alone, no one was judged, no one was left out. It's funny of how balloon compares his own life to such small things, perhaps there's more like balloon.
Balloon always thought if the universe theory was true, if it does then there's something he wants to he answered.
" Maybe in another universe.. I will not care for people who don't care me, maybe.. just maybe.. or maybe in another universe.. I didn't do something stupid, that can affect my whole life.. an one mistake that made me go downhill so.. so.. fast.. " Balloon said, his own reaction at the universe theory. Balloon knew he was talking to none, he had no one to talk to.
After all, this is was loneliness feels like.
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789 words,, embarrassing 💔💔
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