In My Dreams - Bill Kaulitz Story

37. A day in the Tourbus

POV Bill

As the evening fell and we were still on the way to Berlin, we found ourselves in the tour bus, surrounded by the gentle hum of the rolling wheels. It was a relaxed atmosphere. Elise sat across from me, and the rest of the band members were scattered throughout the bus, each occupied with their own things.
I looked again at the text in my notebook, "There's no real love in you," and my thoughts drifted to my Elise. These words seemed so relevant to the situation. I had been with the Elise of my world for a while now, and our relationship had almost become automatic. It felt like we loved each other without thinking much about it. But was that real love? And did she really love me?
I had spent so much time with this Elise and had developed strong feelings for her, but was it true love or just innocent friendship? And what about the other Elise in my life?
I had promised myself and this Elise that I wouldn't allow feelings for her. My heart belonged to my girlfriend, my Elise. But why was it so difficult to ignore these feelings?
I had developed strong feelings for this new Elise in my life, and it made me ponder. What did true love mean? Was it the automatic affection I felt for my girlfriend, or was it the passion and excitement I felt when I was around this Elise? "Why do I keep lovin' you?" I muttered to myself.
I looked at Elise, who was staring at the passing landscape. She seemed peaceful and lost in thought, and I couldn't help but smile. She had a positive influence on me.

The rest of the band had joined us without me noticing. I looked up when Georg asked if I was working on a new song. I smiled and nodded. "Yes, I was just jotting down some lyrics and ideas for new songs. There's always inspiration to be found on tour."
Tom, sitting next to Georg, made a face. "When are you going to let us hear that new masterpiece, Bill? We want to know what you've got up your sleeve."
Gustav grinned and took a sip of his drink. "Well, we're curious. Maybe we can get a sneak peek?"
I thought for a moment and said, "Let's hold off on that, guys. I don't want to reveal too much before the song is ready."
Bas then asked curiously, "Are you already working on your next album?" Tom looked up from his laptop and nodded. "Yeah, we have a few tracks ready. We always try to stay creative, even during the tour."
Bas smiled and turned to me, "Eeuh, Bill, I know I'm jumping ahead a bit, but have you thought about the opening act for the next tour? I mean, I'd love to tour with Elise again."
I thought for a moment and then shook my head. "No, Bas, that's not going to happen. I'd gladly take you on tour, but not Elise."
An uncomfortable silence fell in the tour bus. Tom tried to break the tension and said with a smile, "Sorry, Elise, when Bill is busy with lyrics, he can be a bit dramatic."
Elise smiled weakly and tried to save the situation. "No problem, guys. I understand. I'm just glad I got to tour with you this time."
I saw Elise sitting stiffly next to me, and I realized that my words were harsher than I intended. But it was actually about the other Elise. I didn't want her on tour anymore, and that decision was final.
Bas looked thoughtful for a moment and then asked, "Are you two still a couple?" He looked from Elise to me and added, "I've heard from Tom what has happened, and honestly, I've never seen you two kiss."
Tom hesitated for a moment and then began, "Elise isn't a fan of public displays of affection, Bas. Not when there are no cameras rolling. But that doesn't mean there's nothing between them. Bill is just a bit dramatic sometimes, as you can see."
I felt a bit uncomfortable in the whole situation. It was weird to talk about my relationship with Elise while my real girlfriend wasn't even sitting next to me, and the rest of the band stared at us.
In that awkward moment, Elise suddenly grabbed my hand, and I felt a surge of electricity through me. Her hand was soft and warm, and as she held my hand, she looked deep into my eyes. My heart started beating faster, and in the intensity of the moment, I felt a thousand butterflies wildly fluttering in my stomach. Her touch sent a shiver through me, and I couldn't help but look back into her beautiful eyes. It felt like the whole world around us disappeared, and there was only Elise and me.
Elise spoke softly, but her words were infused with sincerity. "Bill," she said, looking me straight in the eyes, "I know things are a bit complicated between us right now," she said, her voice soft and seductive, "but we keep it very professional, right?" I felt my breath catch.
The soft smile playing on Elise's lips made me melt. "Right," I said, and her thumb stroked my palm.
Eventually, Tom broke the enchantment and said with a grin, "Okay, let's stop this romantic scene!" We all laughed, but I couldn't ignore the excitement and tension between Elise and me. It was clear that there was more going on than what we could or wanted to admit. Elise slowly withdrew her hand, and we resumed the conversation about music as if nothing had happened.