Twenty-Eight

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Nat had her hands on my shoulders as I began to shake with fear and anger. My stomach rolled and threatened to bring up everything I had eaten and drank the night before. A cold sweat had built up on my skin and I couldn't find any words.

"I know that this wasn't what you wanted to hear but you needed to hear it," Tony said, "I'm sorry,"

"I...I think I'm going to be sick," I said covering my mouth and the next thing I knew I had a bowl in front of me and I was throwing up, "I'm sorry,"

"Don't say sorry, babe," Nat said rubbing my back.

"How?" I asked and Nat threw the bowl into the bin and gave me a bottle of water, "How the hell did this happen?"

Tony sighed, "I don't know but I suspect that someone was smart enough to hack into my system and get him out. Emily, I wished I had a better answer but I don't,"

"What do we do now?" Steve asked.

"We find them," I said quietly, "And I fucking make sure they stay dead,"

"You can't get involved with their deaths," Bucky said, "It isn't easy to live with,"

"Oh, I don't give a fuck right now," I said, getting to my feet, "Those people ruined me. I was 10-fucking-years old when they found me. They forced me into a life that I didn't want and there was no way out. I was beaten, I was assaulted and I was fucking raped. I don't care if killing isn't easy to live with because there is no way in hell that I am going to let any other fucker kill them,"

The room was silent and I saw how dark everyone's expressions had become. I had just dropped information on them that I hadn't told anyone. Not even Tony. Tears burned my eyes and I let out a shaky breath before leaving the room.

Tears dropped down my cheek and I wrapped my arms around myself, heading to the roof. I wiped my eyes and walked over to the edge, trying to stop crying. But it wasn't working, I dropped to my knees sobbing. I opened my mouth and screamed as loud as I could, not caring if anyone could hear me.

A pair of arms went around me and I held onto them, crying into their shirt.

"It's ok," Nat whispered and rubbed my back, "Just let it out. It's good to cry,"

"Why didn't they just kill me?" I cried, "Then I-I wouldn't be in so much pain,"

"Emily, look at me," Nat said softly and put her hands on my face, "Don't ever think like that. I understand how you feel but what would we do without you? You're my best friend and I need you. We all need you. You have been given a chance at a better life. Please don't think about what they could have done,"

"I feel so weak," I cried and hugged her tightly, "I tried to keep strong but something always happens and it drags me back down,"

"I know,"

"And to find out that I was born into Hydra? How the hell is that fair?" I said and I wiped my eyes.

"Unfortunately, not everyone has a great start to life but it's what you choose to do after that makes you a better person. A stronger person,"

I sniffed and nodded, "I wish I could believe that. I still have no memory of parts of my teenage years. I don't remember who my biological parents are but knowing that I was hanging around with people who worked for Hydra makes me feel sick to the stomach. If I wasn't adopted then what would have happened to me?"

"Instead of thinking about the what-ifs, think about now. Think about how great your life is and how loved you are," Nat wiped my tears away with her thumbs, "Do you want to know what I see in front of me?"

"No, but I'm sure you will tell me,"

Nat smiled, "I see a beautiful, strong, smart independent woman who won't take shit from anyone. You have a dark past but so do most people living in this tower. It's how we move on and make a better person of ourselves. Take Bucky for example,"

My heart leapt into my throat at the mention of his name and I was glad that my cheeks were flushed with tears.

"He was taken by Hyrda and experimented on. When he fell off that train he was taken again and the poor guy was forced to do their dirty work. The Winter Soldier killed a hell of a lot of people and he had no idea," Nat said, "It took him years to become the person he is now. We all helped him and he smiles more now. Then look at Steve,"

Another missed heartbeat.

"He was some little kid and took serum to join the army to help the country. He saw death and killed people. Plus, he was frozen for 70 years and thought he lost the love of his life. Emily, what about me? Look at what I have been through but now look at me. I'm damn sexy and no one can chat shit about me cause I'd kick their asses,"

I managed a laugh and I nodded, "I suppose."

"Now," Nat said pulling me to my feet, "Wipe your eyes and let's go back to the others. Tony hasn't said a word since you left and I think he blames himself for what has happened,"

Nat took my hand and pulled me along behind her. We briefly stopped at my floor so I could wash my face and brush my teeth, then we were on our way again. My heart thumped hard against my rib cage and when I stepped into the room, everyone stood up, watching me silently.

"Emily, I'm so sorry," Tony said rushing towards me. I met him halfway in a hug and bit my bottom lip to stop myself from crying, "I knew you had a rough time but I had no idea that they did those things to you. If you didn't get to them first then we will. I promise you, that those monsters who hurt you will pay for what they did."

"It's ok," I whispered, "I'll be ok,"

"Good," Tony said squeezing me one last time, "I'm not sure whether you will take this as good news, but we found a place where they might be hiding. Are you up for a little trip?"

I looked up at him, my eyes now dry of tears, "What a stupid question. When do we leave?"

Tony smiled, "That's my girl,"



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Belonging to me [[Bucky Barnes x Oc x Steve Rogers ]] 18+Wo Geschichten leben. Entdecke jetzt