the hated child

chapter forty-eight

Previously...

Mistake conjured an iPad and started singing, "Sticking out your GYATT for the RIZZLER!!!! You're so SKIBIDI!!!! You're so FANUM TAX!!!! I just wanna be your SIGMA!! FREAKING come HERE!! Give me your OHIO!!!!!"

Ebony started to shake from fear. What was Mistake singing? And why did it scare her so much?

"COCOMELON!!!! HAHAHA!!! I CAN'T WAIT TO EAT SOME PASKETTI!!" Mistake flailed her arms around and started throwing her iPad in the air.

"Careful Mistake!! You're gonna break the iPad!!"

"RAHHHHH!!" Mistake charged towards Ebony, throwing a tantrum, "MY IPAD BROCKEN!! Like my soul </3"

"Ugh... What am I gonna do with this useless toddler..." Ebony picked up Mistake with her pinky toe and sighed. "Come on child, let's go...."


Present Time

Mistake revealed her snake fangs and injected venom into Ebony's arm.

"AUGH!" she groaned, letting go of Mistake and sending a baby into the ground.

"WEEEEEEEEE!!!" Mistake exclaimed, she immediately got up and asked "D-do you have macaroni and chicken strips?"

Ebony sighed, "This is why I wanted to be a LONER! People are just so... ew."

"Ew?"

"YEA! EW!! You DISGUST me you poopy-iPad-Fortnite-Rainbow-Friends-Skibidi-Toilet-Poppy-Playtime-Sonic-Elsa-Spiderman-ew child."

Mistake had no idea what Ebony just said, but started crying anyway.

"Imagine crying," said Ebony. "That's so... stupid and EMOTIONAL. As you know, I don't HAVE emotions. 'Cause I'm GOTH. NOT EMO!!" She then pulled out an iPod to play My Chemical Romance songs.

"WOAHH!!! You're GOD?"

"What? WAIT... Yes, I am. Now PRAISE ME!! BOW DOWN TO MY FEET, CHILD."

Mistake stared at Ebony with disco ball eyes. "WOAHHH!!!!!" She jumped and did flips, "I'M TELLING MY FRIENDS THAT I'M FRIENDS WITH GOD!!"

"F-friends??" Ebony felt her heart THROBBING and POUNDING and THRUSTING, "You think we're friends?"

"YEA!!!" Mistake jumped for joy. "Unless... unless we're not?" She made an EXTREMELY sad face, sadder than this emoji —> 🥺.

Ebony felt pity for the lonely child, conjuring a little witch's toe wart for Mistake to play with.

"YAYYYYY!!!!!" Mistake shouted.

Ebony's eyes softened, seeing herself in this young and naive toddler. Then she punched that toddler in the nonexistent balls.

"OWWW!! MY TESTICLESSSSSS." Mistake shouted. Even as a dumb baby, she always used the proper words for things.

Ebony shouted, "YOU'RE DUMB!! HOW DARE YOU REMIND ME OF MYSELF BEFORE I WAS TRAUMATIZED AND IN MY SAD UWU BOY PHASE."

"How in the WORLD is that my fault? I don't have any control over whomever I remind you of!"

"Ummm... Why are you using big boy words again? Stop. THE TEENAGER MISTAKE IS SO EW!! KEEP THE BABY ONE, PLEASE!!!"

"Well, there's no need to be rude..." Mistake said.

Ebony tried punching Mistake again in her bodily orbs.

"ALAS! MINE OWN EYES!!!" a dramatic Mistake dramatically cried, dramatic, dramatically fainting for dramatically dramatic effect. "THOU HAST INJURED ME!" She paused. "Wait... are we close enough for me to say thou? Or would it be you, since that was the formal word?"

"Ugh... DRAMA QUEEN MISTAKE is back. I DIDN'T EVEN HIT YOU THAT HARD!! Also, STOP TRYING TO BE SO SMART YOU PICK ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Mistake sighed, crossing her arms. "The definition of a pick-me is a woman who obviously and obsessively works to gain men's attention or acceptance. Do you see any men near us? In addition to this, calling me a pick-me implies that I'm speaking like this to make people — specifically men — like me. This is incorrect! I speak like this naturally. Also, people hate it when I speak like this, especially men."

Ebony's inferiority complex started acting up. She thought, How can Mistake in a dumbed-down state STILL be smarter than me? She's LITERALLY a toddler right now...

Ebony sighed deeply and pretended to be bored. "Whatever, LOSER."

Mistake was irritated because of Ebony's disrespectful behaviour, so she transformed into an angel and started SMITING the goth with holy energy.

"AHHHHHH!!!!" Ebony shrieked, frantically running around trying to avoid the deadly lasers of an angel.

Suddenly, the 2 heard a crash coming from the lower floor.

"...what was that?"