First Impression: It's great that you're entering this story in Wattys2016!
To start off, you have a great summary that's detailed and definitely well thought out and well developed. You have great descriptions and a strong start. I love the concept of this story because of how interesting, unique, and original the idea is! I really like the length of the chapters because they are short, but filled with information. I would love to see more history about Xia and Xander, and all the other teenagers as well. For example, what do you mean when you said Xia "bought them"? I got a little confused there, and I wasn't sure if Xia is the motherly figure? Other than that, I'm excited to see where the story goes!
Remember that these suggestions are just my opinion, and this is your story, so make sure to write it the way you want it to be! If you don't agree with any of my suggestions, then ignore them :)
If you are feeling nice, I would greatly appreciate it if you give one of my stories a read, follow me, or give me a shoutout! If you enjoy making art, I would love for you to make something for one of my stories, and I will post it!
Please comment below a rating of how helpful you thought this review was. (out of 5 stars) Thanks!
- bluecrayonlady
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Book Reviews 2 [SLOW UPDATES]
RandomThis is the second book for Book Reviews! The first one is completed, so please don't comment your request there. If you comment there, I won't respond. Again, here are the rules! Submit a form to get your book reviewed! Please remember that thes...
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