breathe// 5SOS

43

Tw. abuse
Ava

I had a bad dream.

What Viola said had made me dig a hole, and I was spiralling down into a pit of memories I didn't want to be in.

I hadn't told dad all of it, I'd barely managed to tell the police.

How could I tell him, someone who cares about me and loves me? He would be so mad.

I wasn't even sure if it was a dream, because dreams were supposed to be imagination, and mine weren't. It was a real thing that had happened over, and over, and over.

I just wanted dad to be happy, and funny, and not worry.

But every corner of my room loomed over me, suffocating me; if I looked long enough I could see them.

I could smell the damp. I could feel my knees cut, my neck being squeezed as they made me look into their eyes.

The way they covered my mouth as I screamed in agony. The smoke filling my lungs. The blood. Tears. Fainting.

Every single...

Slice.                   Punch.
             Slap.              Grab.         Gasp.
Crash.        Kick.   
                                             Cry.
Poke.           Taunt.                      Choke.

Monster.

And it wouldn't go away.
And I didn't know why it was back.
And I thought I was getting better.
And I saw their faces.
And I heard their voices.
And I felt the pain again.

I grabbed my phone and called Marcus, the line not picking up.

"Marcus," I quivered.

I called again, he didn't pick up.

"Marcus," I said more loudly.

I rang again, he picked up.

"Marcus," I cried, "Marcus, help. Help me, they're here, please help me. They're in my room,"

"Ava, what the fuck?" he mumbled, "who?"

"They're here," I shouted, "they're gonna do it again,"

"Ava, you're scaring me,"

I felt a hand on my shoulder, then another, that gently pushed me back. Someone else took my phone and the light came on, my body freezing.

"Woah, woah," dad said, "Ava, babygirl,"

He took his hands from my shoulders and cupped my face instead, wiping the tears. I whimpered, tightly gripping his arms.

"They're here,"

"They're not here," he whispered, "They're not here,"

"There were in the corner,"

"No one is here, I promise,"

"They're good at hiding,"

"You need your inhaler,"

"They might've poisoned it, or-or,"- "Ava, it's just me, and it's just Viola,"

"Where?"