feeling unlovable

you've had dreams about my mom?

IV

Emma always wanted to have a bachelorette party. Celebrate the last night she would be Emma Harper because she was becoming Emma Hayden soon. Emma was thrilled at the idea.

But Emma realized that you can't really have a bachelorette party when none of your friends know you're engaged. Or arranged to be married but Emma couldn't blame them for her absence of a party. She wasn't allowed to tell anyone about the wedding. The only people that knew were the two families which benefitted Felix but put Emma to a disadvantage.

Felix could still have the pleasure of seeing other girls because to others, he was still the single, player who was destined to never get married and knock up some one-night stand. Not her conclusion, it was Marcus's.

Emma only had the ache of seeing him with other girls and having to keep her mouth shut because she was weak. She didn't have it in her to take something away from him. Emma was the girl to do everything in her power to make the ones around her happy.

That's why she didn't tell her mom that Felix was with another girl at school even though Felix promised he wouldn't. Emma was told their marriage had to be as real as possible, they had to act as if they were dearly in love so their marriage wouldn't be such a shocker and people wouldn't ask too many questions when their marriage was revealed to the public.

Emma didn't struggle with the love part but Felix, he struggled with the part that was between his legs.

"Emma?"

Emma's head snapped up towards Pete who was talking to her. His cute face was turned into an annoyed look, his thick eyebrows knitted together and his lips slightly pouted, probably because he had been talking to his friend for an hour and she hadn't payed attention to a word he was saying.

Emma smiled sheepishly, "Sorry, Pete. My head was somewhere else."

"Clearly, I've been trying to get your attention for ten minutes. You didn't even notice that I told you I've been having dreams about your mom ...not that I have." Pete blushed, "I'm just saying you were way out there."

Emma giggled, "You had dreams about my mom?"

"No! Emma!" If even possible, Pete's face flushed further and his eyes darted to the book he was currently reading, he desperately wanted to end this conversation.

"I was trying to get your attention and I thought that saying... I had dreams about your mom would shock you out of your day dreaming." Pete whispered the part about her mom. "Next time I need your attention, I'll talk about how hot your dad is."

"You think my dad's hot?"

"I was— no," Pete groaned, "I don't, I was just saying that next time I want your attention I'll say that."

Emma nodded her head, raising an eyebrow at him questionably but Pete quickly stuck his head in between a book, away from the world once his eyes took in the first words. Emma wanted to ask what book he was reading, the look he always got on his face when he talked about his books filled her with warmth.

Beckie sighed from beside Emma and looked towards her, leaning closer so no one around the table would hear them. "How are you holding up? With that?" Beckie looked over her shoulder, Emma following her gaze to see Felix sitting at his usual popular table with his new girl on his lap. Specifically, the girl Emma gave him the night of the dance. Ashely.

Emma shrugged towards Beckie, "I have to stop being affected by him being with other girls. It's not his fault he doesn't feel the same way about me and I'm not going to cry because he doesn't want me."