Reviews Corner-on Request

Review by thenameisfoureyes

_ProudMuslimah_ Poetries...

What I love about your poems is the simplicity. The words weren't that complicated and it contributed to the whole vibe of the poems. The positivity was evident and they were able to depict your personality and advocacy. It shows your value for family and the environment, how amazing you think the world is and also implied how random you think. (I love the Chocolate Land and the Do Not Read this Poem).

However, I have a few suggestions that may help you improve your work further.

-stanza forming, balance and harmony. I suggest form four lined stanzas and try to maintain it all throughout the poem. This adds to the appeal of the poem and makes it look organized. In addition, it will make you realize which lines lack measurement or can be improved in terms of length. I also suggest to keep your lines close in terms of length with the shorter line at least 2/3 of the longer line. For really short lines, you can converge them, especially if it only consists of one word. Do this all throughout and you'll achieve balance and harmony.

-punctuation. I noticed that you lack commas in most lines. You can add them after a line and the following line can be followed by a period. Keep in mind that in poetry, a stanza can be equivalent to a paragraph in a prose. And just like in prose, each stanza should have a main idea. The challenge is how to compress the main along with the supporting ideas in a single stanza using just figurative language. It's hard, but it is possible. Do not forget the spaces in between stanzas.

-you can also improve further on the melody. Just like in songs, there's a certain melody in poetry especially when read out loud. Thus, it is advisable for you to maintain the vowel intonation patterns in a stanza. It doesn't need to be in the whole stanza, but the ideal is for the second and fourth.

I also hope for you to segregate the quotes from the poems themselves. Also, try to add more to your short poems.

That's all for this review, my apology if this took so long. I hope this review helps and feel free to discuss the corrections if ever they seem unclear. It's a pleasure for me to be able to create a review for an amazing poet such as yourself.

Yours truly,

thenameisfoureyes