Reviews Corner-on Request

Review by fallingstars99

Title- Lightweight

Author- @xoxolazygirl

Storyline-

The story is about a girl who is suffering from anorexia and her journey with her second love.

Cover-

Cover of story should be more detailed. Your name is not visible and it doesn't match with the material or title of the story.
Rating-2/5

Preface-

The preface of the story explains almost the entire story. Try to make it less descriptive, because in your first chapter, same things are repeated. Check out the grammatical errors too.
Rating-3/5

Plot-

You have a strong plot and the characters are quite impressive. Rachael is really beautifully portrayed by you. She breaks down, faces problems, but stands up again that is really good.
Moments between her and Sam are really good and Blake is a sweetheart.
I loved the way it proceeded from the high school to college. Also the way Rachael handled things.

I like the way it is going but you need to work on some things.

Recommendations-

1.) Always remember to use the capital letter at the start of sentence. Put space between coma and start of another sentence.

2.) Make the dialogues more descriptive and try to put more emotions where is it needed most (like recent break up scene)

3.) Use smaller paragraphs in the first few chapters. In the later chapters it is okay though.

4.) You have a book in which you are writing about a major health problem. So if you will be more descriptive with words and methods how she coped up with it, it will bind the readers to the story.

5.) Just go through the chapters once more, there are little mistakes here and there, Like inverted commas, full stops etc. Set them straight and it will be good to read.

Conclusion-
I have been reading the story from very start and I have seen the way your writing skills have evolved. You are improving and I hope you continue to do so. I really like the content and concept personally. It's great story for those who don't believe in second love. I am so excited to see where it goes.

Overall rating- 3.5/5

Lots of love and wishes,
Star ⭐